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2026-04-08

Perfect Repair Day

All 21 conflicts resolved — avg recovery 12 min, max 81 min, 0 unresolved.

Transcript (tap to expand)

[2026-04-08 07:45:00] Dave: **WAA ALERT** Morning routine has been disrupted. Please expect delays on morning voice message. No action is necessary on your part. Normal operations will resume shortly. **END OF ALERT**
[2026-04-08 07:49:00] Sam Willis: <no text>
[2026-04-08 07:58:00] Sam Willis: Remind me to tell you about my brother and his ex wife
[2026-04-08 07:58:00] Sam Willis: Also. Good morning
[2026-04-08 07:58:00] Sam Willis: Also. What’s happening?!?
[2026-04-08 07:58:00] Sam Willis: I don’t like this. It’s weird. Are you ok?
[2026-04-08 07:59:00] Sam Willis: I just woke up not too long ago. Slept like ass. Head is pounding. Decided I’m going to wait to drive in until like 9 when I have a small break in meetings to do so. I hate all these fucking meetings and 1x1s. I’m grumpy. Hmph. I love you.
[2026-04-08 08:00:00] Dave: Audio Message.caf Transcription: Good morning sunshine Nothing to be alarmed about I just Gotta take Emerson work gotta pick Emerson up from the body shop after I drop his car off Get fixed and which also means I'll be driving him back-and-forth to work Again, so that's gonna suck for however who knows how long that's gonna be probably a week or two I guess it shouldn't send that Anyway, how are you? I'm feeling pretty good. I went to sleep and woke up thinking about you. I cannot wait to see you and snuggle you. How good your body's gonna feel and smell when it's all pressed up to mine God cannot wait Yeah, so Just The regular all day disruption was just from Not getting out the door early like I've been doing Plus which course led to fucking with my website and I got a couple orders to get out That kind of stuff so I hope you slept well. Probably sore from your workout yesterday, huh? That sounded pretty pretty intense Or remind me, did you say Christian was applying for apartments yesterday? It's only been Just curious Hasn't been Are y'all gonna look at more places apartment? I guess it was a house Or is he just going straight for the one? From from yesterday or Monday DTSTTF There's there's now less like Funny, kind of Waves arms around parallels, but there's a it's just it's going to be like a really good show like I mean it's been good from the beginning but like the last couple episodes I've gotten like really I don't know if twist is the right word but there's been Some twist a little bit I think I twist someone unexpected things have happened and like Hoopers character is like it's turned into like this really emotional like drama kinda thing but it's still like got a little bit of funny and suspense and stuff too but like the episode from yesterday or I guess from last Sunday I watched yesterday was Yeah, it was really like just it's emotional. This was pretty serious like I was. Surprised cause it Whipped out some good acting, which is not like a surprise I guess because Cooper and that other guy the other main character are both like obviously accomplished doctors so yeah I think you should watch it. It's it's all around. Remind me, did you ever watch Ozark? That was a really good show to you and has that guy that's also DTF. I can't remember his name but I always think whenever I see you that's one of those shows that I was like if I. Could raise a show for memory and watch it again that would be on the list Ones that I would do for sure that was a really good show I might probably be able to find Something else to do again, but that one Anyway, I'm just rambling Shows that you've watched like of all time If you could erase all memory and watch it over again Would that be for you? Curious about that I'll probably come up with a top five breaking bad would probably be up there That was definitely good I don't know how it holds up today, but there is a show of way back in the early 2000s called the shield on the 90s, but it was a cop drama Like if you think about how shit was on TV back Like really push the limits of what society was used to see it on TV because it was grimy kind of like a training day like Julie absolutely despise his training day because of how grimy like gritty and real. It is like the whole movie you're just like oh my God. Your brother, his ex-wife you've only got one brother right I can never remember because I feel like I don't know yeah I mean Because the one that just is doing the Financial advisor thing He married before I'm all fucked up It's weird yeah I'm fine. Yeah, I thought that message wouldn't be like obviously comical like if something was really wrong. It wouldn't be vague. All right anyway coming up on 7 1/2 inches so I will let this go since you're worried and won't talk to you soon, sweetheart. I love you. Can't wait to see you and you are the prettiest prettiest Schwabe yeah prettiest Swabby there. I was gonna try to Bye
[2026-04-08 08:00:00] Dave: Hahaha, yeah I’m fine. Just dropping Emerson’s car off
[2026-04-08 08:01:00] Dave: You really need to get a handle on all these one on ones 😱. That’s like, your whole day just…. Gone
[2026-04-08 08:01:00] Sam Willis: Can’t wait to listen. Gotta get into the shower. Love you! Talk soon
[2026-04-08 08:01:00] Sam Willis: Almost 8 inches!
[2026-04-08 08:01:00] Sam Willis: 😜
[2026-04-08 08:02:00] Dave: Yess!! I love it that’s catching on
[2026-04-08 08:02:00] Dave: I mention it in the message too hehehe
[2026-04-08 08:02:00] Sam Willis: God, I’m so pleased you don’t have a micropeen btw
[2026-04-08 08:02:00] Dave: LMAO
[2026-04-08 08:02:00] Sam Willis: I mean…they deserve love. But just like…from someone else
[2026-04-08 08:02:00] Sam Willis: 😂😂
[2026-04-08 08:02:00] Sam Willis: I’m going to hell
[2026-04-08 08:02:00] Dave: Yeah, just a regular old small peen
[2026-04-08 08:03:00] Sam Willis: It’s a perfect peen!!!
[2026-04-08 08:03:00] Dave: 😜
[2026-04-08 08:03:00] Dave: Hehehe, yeah.. I love it
[2026-04-08 08:06:00] Dave: Ha! Plus!.. if it was too big we wouldn’t be able to fit another one in there 😈
[2026-04-08 08:08:00] Sam Willis: Eeeeee!!!!
[2026-04-08 08:08:00] Sam Willis: We might still not be able to do that. Ha 😅 but we gonna try!
[2026-04-08 08:13:00] Dave: This is so hot 🥵🥵🥵
[2026-04-08 08:13:00] Dave: Just that you want to try 🫠
[2026-04-08 08:13:00] Dave: Succeed or not
[2026-04-08 08:13:00] Dave: This is so hot 🥵🥵🥵
[2026-04-08 08:13:00] Dave: Just that you want to try 🫠
[2026-04-08 08:13:00] Dave: Succeed or not
[2026-04-08 08:40:00] Sam Willis: I absolutely cannot wait until I no longer have to deal with pain in the ass, inconsiderate, teenagers
[2026-04-08 08:40:00] Dave: Hahaha, no shit
[2026-04-08 08:41:00] Dave: What did that one do today lol
[2026-04-08 08:47:00] Sam Willis: Just woke up as it was time to leave for school. And then just sulked out of his room with an attitude like everyone else was the problem instead of him. 😑
[2026-04-08 08:48:00] Sam Willis: 🙄
[2026-04-08 08:50:00] Dave: Hahaha, yep… I feel your pain
[2026-04-08 08:51:00] Sam Willis: Listening to your message now
[2026-04-08 08:51:00] Sam Willis: Ummm how is the Emerson car situation going to work when you’re “in Austin”?
[2026-04-08 08:51:00] Dave: I’m omw to work now
[2026-04-08 09:08:00] Dave: Juliet will figure it out
[2026-04-08 09:09:00] Sam Willis: <no text>
[2026-04-08 09:09:00] Sam Willis: Grrrr cut me off AGAIN. Ok uno momento
[2026-04-08 09:13:00] Sam Willis: Transcription: I swear to God this piece of shit anyway, I don't remember. I don't know exactly where I'm coming off, but I was talking about Lily Allen and I think it's David Harbour and the cheating and the revenge album and all that sort of stuff. Yes, I need to watch DTF. I just wanna watch about myself. I don't wanna watch it with Christian and like I don't know I just need to sit down most of the time when I sit down we're watching a show like together. So it's just taking a while plus he liked totally hog the TV and yes, there are multiple TVs in the house. It's just different like that's where I wanna be so yeah. I have to think about the show if I could erase and watch all over again did you say breaking bad cause I love breaking bad I would honestly probably Think of something that's more drama like parenthood oh my God or brothers and sisters of God so good I'm gonna have to go soon cause I have my stupid fucking daily stand-up so fucking stupid. These meetings are such a waste of my time but anyway. OK, so I gotta think though so so so many good shows so many good shows but I will watch DTF one day. I will OK the other things yeah I'll have to tell you about my brother in a minute. I'll text it to you and then also. Fuck, what else all did you say oh Christian did put in an application yesterday for the second house that we saw that we both liked not that my opinion really matters but anyway and then they reached out to him yesterday and said you need to unfreeze your credit so he did that so he should probably hear back today So fingers crossed still very, very, very, very, very worried about him losing his job. I just am like totally on edge about. Waiting for the other shoe to drop type thing and this not be good I just I just really hope not but speaking of a new job. I've also got to prioritize getting my résumé in shape and seeing what's out there cause this is ridiculous. Anyway, the hell might be the same situation for me where I might not be wanting to get a new job right before. I'm trying to get a new house loan oh no ma'am. Oh no, I just I can't be doing this commute even when I'm single and like living in this, this commute sucks ass to like have to be able to take care of the dogs and just all the things that are required to be taken care of in a day you know what I mean pool guys coming over landscapers coming over pest guys the dogs just there's so much to be gone 10 hours a day OK, I'm really sorry this has been all over the place but I will be back yes and I love you and I will be back and hopefully my headache will be gone and yeah
[2026-04-08 09:21:00] Dave: End of next week for the car probably
[2026-04-08 09:22:00] Dave: Hahaha, yeah watch
[2026-04-08 09:22:00] Dave: Yeah breaking bad was great
[2026-04-08 09:25:00] Dave: Has there been more indicators on him losing his job? Or are you just still worried from the last thing a couple weeks ago?
[2026-04-08 09:26:00] Dave: I think YOU’ll be fine as far as getting a home loan because you’ll have money from the sale of your current house, and you also have retirement assets and stuff to lean on
[2026-04-08 09:26:00] Dave: Plus good credit
[2026-04-08 09:32:00] Sam Willis: Still worried about the PIP
[2026-04-08 09:32:00] Sam Willis: Yea agreed bc I was changing jobs when i moved from stl to phoenix and it was not an issue so hopefully
[2026-04-08 09:32:00] Sam Willis: About to jump on a 1x1 with fuckface
[2026-04-08 09:32:00] Dave: Which one?
[2026-04-08 09:32:00] Dave: Stephen?
[2026-04-08 09:32:00] Sam Willis: Yea agreed bc I was changing jobs when i moved from stl to phoenix and it was not an issue so hopefully
[2026-04-08 09:32:00] Sam Willis: Still worried about the PIP
[2026-04-08 09:33:00] Sam Willis: My brother….
[2026-04-08 09:33:00] Dave: Whatever… he just has to make it into the rental 🤞
[2026-04-08 09:33:00] Sam Willis: <no text>
[2026-04-08 09:34:00] Sam Willis: Then this was the text exchange with his ex
[2026-04-08 09:34:00] Sam Willis: <no text>
[2026-04-08 09:34:00] Dave: Lmao… satan
[2026-04-08 09:34:00] Sam Willis: <no text>
[2026-04-08 09:34:00] Sam Willis: I would fucking die
[2026-04-08 09:36:00] Dave: Hahahahaa holy shit
[2026-04-08 09:38:00] Dave: It could have been a lot worse though lol. “…life is bleak” is pretty tame in the grand scheme of things
[2026-04-08 09:39:00] Dave: What did she do that pissed everyone in Watseka off enough that she can’t even get a job there?!
[2026-04-08 09:56:00] Sam Willis: Transcription: I think he's being dramatic about how she pissed everyone in what seeker off although it is a small fucking town but anyway Well, she's in her 20s and she I guess is with a guy that's like late 40s or 50s and he was having an affair with his wife or on his wife with Carmen now like Carmen and hammer together or something he has like grown ass kids and I guess That whole thing like corrupted I don't freaking know but also like the thing that she did to Brandon is she? I mean, she had like eight affairs on him at least. Probably more and like they were together for they were together all in all for like maybe 10 years nine years I don't know Lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots of cheating with different men and my brother and her well my brother owned the gym That he bought for my parents long time ago and Carmen was the one working there every day cause my brother does you know had other jobs and she was sleeping with lots of people at the gym? So the gym was in Waseca and they've Brandon sold it after the divorce but anyway Just fucking drama, I cannot believe he said that to her, though I would die absolutely die
[2026-04-08 09:57:00] Dave: So that’s your bro’s ex wife?
[2026-04-08 09:57:00] Dave: EIGHT?!
[2026-04-08 09:58:00] Sam Willis: Yes and yes
[2026-04-08 09:58:00] Dave: Hahaha, Jesus
[2026-04-08 09:59:00] Dave: Yeah, I’d die
[2026-04-08 10:03:00] Sam Willis: Transcription: So man, I guess when did this all this all came out earlier last year so I guess you and I weren't talking as much which makes me sad because man there is some drama But So oh my God that's so much so so so much but yeah at some point Brandon moved in with my parents like last April maybe and it was soon after that that she called my mom one Friday night And you gotta know my mom She has no filter she's like that shit crazy and anyway so why she would call my mom Is beyond all of us to tell my mom what she told my mom like why would you tell my mom of all people because my mom is like she's not gonna like baby you but anyway she called my mom one Friday night and Carmen's like a big party or big drinker that was like one of the big things and a relationship too like Braden really wants family and kids and she never ever wanted to settle down. She just wants to party and like they're you know five years apart, maybe more and so like you know everybody kind of thought like yeah she's in her 20 years you know maybe she'll like. Want to change one day and settle down but I don't think she ever will call my mom and said I have to tell you something and proceeded to tell my mom about all of these affairs and just said she couldn't keep it a secret anymore and that like she hates herself for it and never mind you this was after like they already had split up like this was like four or five months after they had already split up and like moved out of the house sold the house all that's for stuff And mom is like Why are you telling me this? She's like the person you need to be telling this to is Brandon and she's like I just don't. I just don't think I can tell him. Can you tell him and mom's like? I'm not fucking telling him you can call him and tell him you know what you were telling me. And so she does that same night bring a mom like they're living together at this point like Brandon is in the house so she mainly does that mom's like what the fuck she confessed to Brandon oh God this guy is even better because like she was literally just talking to Brandon Like that week about how she kind of wanted to like try just kind of dating him to like you know see if like maybe something was still there and like maybe they could actually work it out before the divorce is finalized that was happening just that week and then she tells way I did this the whole time we were together and so Brandon was like we are so done he's like yeah I'm really glad you told me because like that has made this like completely final in my mind like there is no coming back from this like we're done Well, the next day she told her mom that she wanted to be committed at the hospital and so her mom took her to the fucking hospital like she was having a full on mental breakdown and I think she was there for like a couple days and then she got out and the doctor was like working with her. I'm like normalizing her meds like you know cause she's on anxiety, meds, and antidepressants and the fuck and they was all a total shit show. Just insanity
[2026-04-08 10:06:00] Dave: Lmao… she told momma Jo about the affairs?!
[2026-04-08 10:06:00] Dave: Did Brandon know at that point
[2026-04-08 10:06:00] Sam Willis: No
[2026-04-08 10:06:00] Sam Willis: He found out same night
[2026-04-08 10:06:00] Dave: From Jo?
[2026-04-08 10:06:00] Dave: Or from girl?
[2026-04-08 10:07:00] Sam Willis: From Carmen. Mom said you need to call him right now
[2026-04-08 10:07:00] Dave: Months after!!
[2026-04-08 10:07:00] Dave: Lmao ok ok, you just answered that
[2026-04-08 10:07:00] Sam Willis: Listen bro!! 😂
[2026-04-08 10:07:00] Dave: I’ll finish listening
[2026-04-08 10:08:00] Sam Willis: Yupppp
[2026-04-08 10:08:00] Dave: What the actual fuck
[2026-04-08 10:09:00] Dave: Wow! That’s wild
[2026-04-08 10:12:00] Sam Willis: Side note
[2026-04-08 10:12:00] Sam Willis: <no text>
[2026-04-08 10:12:00] Sam Willis: Just got this email
[2026-04-08 10:12:00] Sam Willis: It’s like Schwab KNOWS lol
[2026-04-08 10:12:00] Dave: Hahaha
[2026-04-08 10:17:00] Sam Willis: Alright fam, I got some news to share. Carmen and I talked last night. She admitted to multiple affairs throughout the entire length of our relationship, with multiple different people. She was telling me essentially a timeline of everything. Early on it was like alcohol induced one-offs, but she did mention she was seeing a guy for like 6 months as we were getting married. She stopped telling me stuff around the start of our marriage and said she couldn’t say anymore. Like she couldn’t handle the emotional toll of it all. I am wondering if she stopped because she had an affair with someone closer to me then the others. I know she was seeing someone at the end, allegedly an emotional affair since September with one of the gym members and then physical after we broke up. She said she would tell me the rest soon, but i told her i don’t need to know. She is mentally unstable right now. Obviously she is a sociopath to be able to keep that level of infidelity secret the entire time. But she is seriously mentally Ill currently. Not making sense. She told me in a text at 1am last night she was close to “cracking the code”. And the night before i learned all this she said some really bizarre shit. She i think seriously thinks we will get back together. I’m worried about her harming herself. I am doing ok, truly. Of course it will take some time to process it all and my brain is probably numbing out a bit on this information, but i seriously feel ok. I have created structure in my life that will help me through it. I don’t want anyone to message Carmen, or for anyone to speak about any of this to anyone else. I am trying to get her to go get professional help before she has psychosis, but it may be too late. I’m going back to bed for now and will respond to texts later. Mom knows about it all too. I probably won’t want to talk with anyone on the phone today so don’t feel the need to reach out.
[2026-04-08 10:17:00] Sam Willis: This was the text he sent us at 330 in the morning. It was last June!
[2026-04-08 10:21:00] Dave: 🤯
[2026-04-08 10:21:00] Dave: Poor guy. Ugh
[2026-04-08 10:23:00] Sam Willis: Yea he’s much better off. I’m honestly so glad she didn’t tell him all this right away bc it would have completely broken him. But at this point, they had been split and living apart for 6 months and he already was healing. Had she told him day 1, ooof
[2026-04-08 10:23:00] Sam Willis: But she did tell him she wanted the divorce on fucking New Year’s Eve 🙄
[2026-04-08 10:24:00] Dave: Was he oblivious or did he see it coming at that point?
[2026-04-08 10:24:00] Sam Willis: Ummmm surprised but not oblivious. They were both really depressed and unhappy
[2026-04-08 10:24:00] Dave: Blind sided, rather
[2026-04-08 10:24:00] Sam Willis: But 💯 blindsided about all the cheating
[2026-04-08 10:25:00] Dave: Jeez
[2026-04-08 11:45:00] Sam Willis: Transcription: I am just now leaving to go to the office 940. I am trying to decide if this is better or worse than trying to go in at like six or seven a part of me is like. Maybe this makes my day feel shorter because that I'm not in the office that long and like the morning maybe it makes it feel longer. I don't know man I can't decide I think maybe I hate it all. I don't know I'm hungry. I'm so hungry. So I should probably just get something before I even go in right so then I could just like be in that 40 I don't know anyway I got on here and I don't really have anything to say I cannot wait to see you. We are getting so close really just gotta get through. You know the next few days and then it's all good so excited oh I need to look at how the weather is gonna be better not be hot as fuck. I'm gonna be pissed if it is. Also, dammit, I had a fleeting thought now it's gone. What was it? Oh no, it's just like normally like this is a part of the week. I'm like OK. I just need to now like get up tomorrow morning too and then I'm done that. I know that it's Friday and I can sleep in but no, I have to go in Friday too. Goddamnit, you're not gonna hear me stop complaining about this The good thing is, Rachel will be in the office too so anyway All right well Yeah, what do I I'm feeling very scatterbrained Good news is I knocked out 31 on one so far today Got canceled that's all I got three more to go. I can do this anyway. What is life like? Did you think whenever you were in high school? That your life would consist of nonstop meetings Via the computer I didn't tell you when I was sitting in my junior accounting class in college or in college in high school, which is when I decided that I wanted to go into school for accounting I think that this would be my life. Absolutely the fuck not not saying that how I stayed in accounting that actually would've been any better. But like OK I'm gonna go on tangent for a minute. I grew up with my dad being a police officer/detective depending on when it was and my mom ran the gyms well primarily the one in my hometown. I don't think they got more gyms until after I was already in the house So my gym every day so both of them dad's like you know on patrol driving around and fuck off cause it's Effingham like we started to do. He also was like too lazy to pull people over. For like speeding and shit like spent a lot of time just like hanging out at home when he was supposed to be on patrol so like you know, he's living the life and the mom I was always so jealous of her because she's her own boss and all she does every day Talk to her friends that come into the gym and work out and she was like a personal trainer. You know what the fuck you gotta do like we have to stressful on your own business, but you don't have to fucking answer to anybody. So I grew up thinking I cannot wait to be an adult. This is amazing. Get me out of school and it's like structured bullshit environment. I can just be free all day to do what I want and now here I am a slave to the corporate machine I mean, string way, so if you hear me. This is bullshit. OK bye
[2026-04-08 12:04:00] Dave: Yeah it’s definitely shorter unless you have to stay later since you came in later
[2026-04-08 12:04:00] Sam Willis: Definitely not doing that lol
[2026-04-08 12:05:00] Dave: My drive was actually better coming in later today
[2026-04-08 12:06:00] Sam Willis: Yea it’s better but blahhhh. Still almost 50 min
[2026-04-08 12:06:00] Dave: What would happen if you just… don’t come in tomorrow 🤷‍♂️
[2026-04-08 12:07:00] Sam Willis: Tomorrow? Or Friday?
[2026-04-08 12:07:00] Sam Willis: Either way.
[2026-04-08 12:07:00] Sam Willis: They are tracking
[2026-04-08 12:11:00] Dave: Hahaha… I didn’t know wtf life was going to be like when I was in high school. But I find it hilarious that right after that you said when I decided I wanted to go into school for accounting… like… wtf DID you think it would be like lmao??? If someone asked sophomore Dave what do you think it would be like to go into accounting he would definitely have said “it sounds like you’d be in meetings all day”. And he’d probably also have said “and still be a nerd”.
[2026-04-08 12:13:00] Sam Willis: Transcription: First off a you're a jerk you're not nerdy if you're an accountant OK maybe a little bit No, I totally figured the opposite. I did not being a fucking all day I figured having my head down poking around and spreadsheets looking for Brad and that's kind of how it was back whenever I was in County and actually auditing financial statements. I mean you're reviewing tons of shit and you're like Working kind of backwards to like make sure shit balances I don't know, man it was not this fucking bullshit. I can tell you I didn't have a whole bunch of fucking one on ones. So anyway, that's just different This is not what I signed up for actually this is probably like exactly what I signed up for but like that really Doesn't matter here I am. I still do feel like Schwab has got to be one of the more meeting heavy places right like this this can't be everywhere.
[2026-04-08 12:14:00] Dave: Hahahaa, ok just listened to the rest. That is quite the contrast in work life model
[2026-04-08 12:14:00] Dave: Ok, ok, head down in spreadsheets too. And yeah you’re right that definitely isn’t nerd shit
[2026-04-08 12:15:00] Dave: <no text>
[2026-04-08 12:15:00] Dave: This is basically what I signed up for. 🤔
[2026-04-08 12:15:00] Dave: But then again, I don’t have meetings like you do
[2026-04-08 12:16:00] Dave: So that makes a big diff
[2026-04-08 12:16:00] Dave: Rain af
[2026-04-08 12:17:00] Sam Willis: Yasssss
[2026-04-08 12:17:00] Sam Willis: As long as it doesn’t fuck with my flights
[2026-04-08 12:18:00] Dave: Should be fine since it’s just rain
[2026-04-08 12:33:00] Sam Willis: How’s your day going?
[2026-04-08 12:34:00] Dave: Pretty good. I feel like I got some stuff done.
[2026-04-08 12:35:00] Dave: Are they? Have you seen any reports?
[2026-04-08 12:35:00] Dave: Getting ready to pack up and head home though 🤭
[2026-04-08 12:35:00] Dave: Are they? Have you seen any reports?
[2026-04-08 12:36:00] Dave: I’ve heard they’re tracking but haven’t seen any follow ups
[2026-04-08 12:40:00] Sam Willis: No it’s only at the MD level
[2026-04-08 12:40:00] Sam Willis: No it’s only at the MD level
[2026-04-08 12:40:00] Sam Willis: And probably just ad hoc
[2026-04-08 12:40:00] Sam Willis: Who knows. They’re all cunts
[2026-04-08 12:40:00] Sam Willis: I’m in a bad mood 😅
[2026-04-08 12:41:00] Dave: Lmao
[2026-04-08 12:41:00] Dave: Yeah you are!!
[2026-04-08 12:41:00] Dave: Throwing around the C word 😌
[2026-04-08 12:41:00] Sam Willis: I’m having a mid life crisis I swear.
[2026-04-08 12:41:00] Sam Willis: Totally want to restart new lol
[2026-04-08 12:41:00] Dave: What?!
[2026-04-08 12:42:00] Dave: When did that happen?
[2026-04-08 12:42:00] Sam Willis: Ummm months ago? Lol
[2026-04-08 12:42:00] Sam Willis: Like if you look back at our texts from like October, I’m pretty sure I said I wanted to blow my life up lol
[2026-04-08 12:43:00] Sam Willis: Then you called it depression
[2026-04-08 12:43:00] Sam Willis: 😂
[2026-04-08 12:43:00] Sam Willis: Immmmm calling it an awakening 😂
[2026-04-08 12:57:00] Dave: Oh!
[2026-04-08 12:58:00] Dave: Eric just said Chris is going COE
[2026-04-08 12:58:00] Sam Willis: Ahhh!
[2026-04-08 13:01:00] Sam Willis: I guess no surprise
[2026-04-08 13:01:00] Dave: Yeah
[2026-04-08 13:01:00] Sam Willis: You’re gonna have more work!
[2026-04-08 13:01:00] Sam Willis: YAY YOU
[2026-04-08 13:02:00] Dave: That’s the name of the game
[2026-04-08 13:02:00] Sam Willis: But copilot!!
[2026-04-08 13:02:00] Sam Willis: It’s gonna once all your problems
[2026-04-08 13:02:00] Sam Willis: Solve
[2026-04-08 13:02:00] Sam Willis: Sigh
[2026-04-08 13:30:00] Sam Willis: I’m hornyyyy 💕😍🤤
[2026-04-08 13:32:00] Dave: What is the filthiest thing you can think of right now that you would let me do to you?
[2026-04-08 13:32:00] Sam Willis: Wowza!!!
[2026-04-08 13:32:00] Dave: Hehehe
[2026-04-08 13:33:00] Sam Willis: I wasn’t thinking filthiest hmmm 🤔🤔 lemme think and get some inspiration 😜
[2026-04-08 13:33:00] Dave: Filthy, dirty, slutty…
[2026-04-08 13:33:00] Dave: All work 😏
[2026-04-08 13:36:00] Sam Willis: https://www.reddit.com/user/GovernMeAfterDark/comments/1s87tnq/just_how_you_like_it/?share_id=4_GQ0gnbeTiVR3Cbj4at9&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf&utm_source=share&utm_term=4&seeker-session=true [Mature Content] From GovernMeAfterDark's profile on Reddit: Just how you like it - 2 votes and 1 comment
[2026-04-08 13:37:00] Sam Willis: Not really even all that slutty, but the combination of the choked, pulled, and bound 🥵🥵🥵
[2026-04-08 13:41:00] Dave: Mmmmm yes! That’s perfectly filthy 🤤
[2026-04-08 13:42:00] Dave: I would be happy to oblige, except maybe with a butt plug, just to have something in your ass too 😈
[2026-04-08 13:42:00] Sam Willis: Mmmmm I’m just thinking about how deeeeppp you stick your cock into me. 🤤🤤🤤 ahhh 🔥
[2026-04-08 13:43:00] Sam Willis: 🔥🔥🔥🔥 never used one!
[2026-04-08 13:43:00] Sam Willis: 🔥🔥🔥🔥 never used one!
[2026-04-08 13:44:00] Dave: Omg 🔥🔥🔥
[2026-04-08 13:44:00] Dave: Hehehe, we can add that to the list if you want 😏
[2026-04-08 13:44:00] Dave: Omg 🔥🔥🔥
[2026-04-08 13:46:00] Dave: I am soooo looking forward to getting in there as deep as I can in only 4 daaaaays!
[2026-04-08 13:50:00] Sam Willis: Fackkk I’m so horny
[2026-04-08 13:51:00] Sam Willis: Can’t come fast enough
[2026-04-08 13:51:00] Dave: I am too NOW 🥵🥵
[2026-04-08 13:51:00] Sam Willis: You should give ME an explicit pic now
[2026-04-08 13:51:00] Sam Willis: Can’t cum fast enough either 😜
[2026-04-08 13:51:00] Dave: Hehehe
[2026-04-08 13:51:00] Dave: I was waiting for it
[2026-04-08 13:51:00] Sam Willis: You should give ME an explicit pic now
[2026-04-08 13:52:00] Sam Willis: I knew you were lol
[2026-04-08 13:52:00] Sam Willis: I knew you were lol
[2026-04-08 13:54:00] Dave:
[2026-04-08 13:55:00] Sam Willis: Ahhhhh!!!!!
[2026-04-08 13:55:00] Sam Willis: Hollyyyyyyyy fuck
[2026-04-08 13:55:00] Sam Willis: I want my mouth on that SO BADLY
[2026-04-08 13:55:00] Dave: Ohhh me too!
[2026-04-08 13:55:00] Sam Willis: mmmmm fucking perfection, baby 🤤🤤🤤🤤
[2026-04-08 13:56:00] Sam Willis: I could be on my knees, right there at your desk….i can’t wait to taste you again
[2026-04-08 13:57:00] Dave: I knowww! God I’m going to destroy you 😈
[2026-04-08 13:57:00] Sam Willis: God you’re so so soooooooo hott
[2026-04-08 13:57:00] Dave: I knowww! God I’m going to destroy you 😈
[2026-04-08 13:57:00] Sam Willis: My lower belly is on fire just reading that
[2026-04-08 13:58:00] Dave: Just wait till I get a hold of you
[2026-04-08 13:58:00] Sam Willis: You can so destroy me. Use me however you want 🥵
[2026-04-08 14:03:00] Dave: I’m going to fuck you 6 ways from Sunday, in every hole you have, while choking you, and pulling your hair, for as long as you can possible handle and then I’m going to throw you away like the fucktoy you are 😈😈😈…. But then I’m going to rush back and pick your sweaty, quivering, body up off the floor and place you on the bed gently, clean you up, cover you up, and love and kiss on you for as long as you can possible handle 🥰🥰🥰
[2026-04-08 14:04:00] Sam Willis: Sooooo, Monday? Sex store??? ☺️
[2026-04-08 14:04:00] Sam Willis: Ahh let me read
[2026-04-08 14:05:00] Sam Willis: This is some soft copy Dave energy!!!!
[2026-04-08 14:05:00] Sam Willis: This is some soft copy Dave energy!!!!
[2026-04-08 14:05:00] Sam Willis: No time for love during Naked Rendezvous!! 😂😂😂
[2026-04-08 14:05:00] Dave: We can consider that dipping into the realm of fantasy and not really-going-to 😜
[2026-04-08 14:06:00] Dave: Some of that
[2026-04-08 14:07:00] Dave: Sunday or Monday is fine with me.
[2026-04-08 14:07:00] Sam Willis: I do think we will be even more comfortable with each other this time though
[2026-04-08 14:07:00] Dave: Sunday or Monday is fine with me.
[2026-04-08 14:12:00] Sam Willis: 🤤 I’m still over here obsessing over that pic
[2026-04-08 14:12:00] Dave: First dick pic I’ve ever sent btw
[2026-04-08 14:13:00] Dave: I’m glad you like it 😘
[2026-04-08 14:13:00] Sam Willis: EVER?!??
[2026-04-08 14:14:00] Sam Willis: and I’m the lucky recipient?!?? ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
[2026-04-08 14:15:00] Dave: I’m STILL hard af… and leaking precum like a faucet 💦
[2026-04-08 14:16:00] Sam Willis: Omg I love love love this
[2026-04-08 14:16:00] Sam Willis: <no text>
[2026-04-08 14:16:00] Sam Willis: I seriously cannot wait to have you in my mouth
[2026-04-08 14:17:00] Dave: And I love love love this
[2026-04-08 14:17:00] Dave: And same here baby! I’m so thirsty for your pussy 🤤🤤🤤
[2026-04-08 14:30:00] Sam Willis: Btw, have we talked before about favorite positions? Like which position you can best get off? Surely we’ve discussed this, but I’m not remembering
[2026-04-08 14:30:00] Sam Willis: Unless your answer was like “all of them” 🙄 lol
[2026-04-08 14:51:00] Dave: Yeah I think we have. And I’m pretty sure my answer was all of them 🤭 Best position to get off makes me giggle because literally in every position the battle is not cumming 😅🫣. However, I can say Cowgirl has always been the hardest to handle. That is, ofc, before whatever I got going on now with this SSRI lol. I did have to work to get off last time, which was totally unexpected.
[2026-04-08 14:52:00] Dave: Tell me about your favs!
[2026-04-08 15:00:00] Sam Willis: It could have also been from being with someone new and figuring out each other’s rhythm 🤷‍♀️
[2026-04-08 15:01:00] Dave: Yeah it must have been but I’d think it would be the other way around lol. Like cum too fast.
[2026-04-08 15:03:00] Sam Willis: Getting off from penetration typically is when I’m on my back. I don’t think I’ve ever gotten off doing doggie style before although I do really like the position. I also love being on my stomach with one leg hiked chest with like a pillow under my hips. Or I like from behind like spooning, but that typically ends up with me on my stomach or back lol
[2026-04-08 15:05:00] Sam Willis: I think as we get older, it’s the opposite lol. Like change ups makes it harder to cum. Maybe we get set in our ways/our comfort zones 🤷‍♀️ lol
[2026-04-08 15:05:00] Sam Willis: I think as we get older, it’s the opposite lol. Like change ups makes it harder to cum. Maybe we get set in our ways/our comfort zones 🤷‍♀️ lol
[2026-04-08 15:08:00] Dave: Oooh I wanna try the pillow under your hip with your leg hiked up 🤤🫠
[2026-04-08 15:31:00] Dave: Got an unboxing for you 😁
[2026-04-08 15:34:00] Dave: <no text>
[2026-04-08 16:07:00] Dave: Taking a quick nap
[2026-04-08 16:36:00] Sam Willis: Hahaha is that the new model??
[2026-04-08 16:37:00] Sam Willis: Fancyyyyy. You going to try it out? ☺️
[2026-04-08 16:56:00] Dave: It’s the other one I sell an adapter for so I thought I should probably have one. Plus it’s Lovense so you can control it if you want 😜
[2026-04-08 16:58:00] Sam Willis: Ahhhh!!!
[2026-04-08 16:59:00] Sam Willis: Through the app I already have?!? Oh this is gonna be fun!!!
[2026-04-08 16:59:00] Dave: Yep
[2026-04-08 17:00:00] Sam Willis: Eeeeee!!
[2026-04-08 17:02:00] Sam Willis: Transcription: So a question about that thingy are they designed for you to come in it or I guess if you feel like you're gonna come do you pull out? How does this thing work fascinated also like so what is your adapter doing again with this thing? How does it make it easier to use or whatever
[2026-04-08 17:03:00] Dave: Yeah you can cum in it
[2026-04-08 17:04:00] Sam Willis: I wasn’t sure if it was a bitch to clean
[2026-04-08 17:04:00] Dave: The adapter allows you to uses a Fleshlight with the device
[2026-04-08 17:04:00] Sam Willis: Ok I thought that WAS the flesh light
[2026-04-08 17:04:00] Dave: Like, the brand Freshlight. Both devices have their own proprietary sleeves they come with
[2026-04-08 17:05:00] Dave: No. Fleshlight is a specific brand.
[2026-04-08 17:05:00] Sam Willis: OK what are the device names
[2026-04-08 17:06:00] Dave: The Handy, The Handy 2, and the Lovense Solace Pro.
[2026-04-08 17:06:00] Sam Willis: Ah ok
[2026-04-08 17:06:00] Dave: Sheesh.. get with the male-jack-off-robot program 🙄
[2026-04-08 17:07:00] Sam Willis: <no text>
[2026-04-08 17:09:00] Dave: Fleshlight
[2026-04-08 17:10:00] Dave: Handy 2
[2026-04-08 17:14:00] Sam Willis: Where’s handy 1?
[2026-04-08 17:19:00] Sam Willis: Or was that the first pic
[2026-04-08 17:20:00] Dave: Handy 1 is in the closet
[2026-04-08 17:20:00] Dave: The first pic was just the Fleshlight
[2026-04-08 17:20:00] Sam Willis: Ooo this is finally starting to make sense to me lolol
[2026-04-08 17:21:00] Sam Willis: Ok so do you regularly use any of these?
[2026-04-08 17:23:00] Dave: Nah
[2026-04-08 17:23:00] Dave: I’ve never used the handy 2 lol
[2026-04-08 17:24:00] Sam Willis: lol
[2026-04-08 17:24:00] Sam Willis: So your own hand is better than all of these? ☺️
[2026-04-08 17:26:00] Sam Willis: This reminds me. Before crazy night, did you ever masturbate thinking about me?
[2026-04-08 17:27:00] Sam Willis: We might have talked about this before 🤔
[2026-04-08 17:30:00] Dave: Ooooh I don’t think we have talked about that! Ever? Yes. Regularly? No. I did around the times we reunited at the leadership meetings but otherwise I saw you as close/best friend. Hbu??
[2026-04-08 17:35:00] Sam Willis: Pft I was masturbating to you back in 2022
[2026-04-08 17:35:00] Dave: Heheh
[2026-04-08 17:35:00] Dave: Well yeah, back then for sure
[2026-04-08 17:35:00] Sam Willis: Sigh
[2026-04-08 17:39:00] Dave: Sigh what?
[2026-04-08 17:39:00] Sam Willis: It’s annoying 😂
[2026-04-08 17:39:00] Sam Willis: The wanting
[2026-04-08 17:42:00] Sam Willis: Whoaaaaa
[2026-04-08 17:42:00] Sam Willis: That’s hott
[2026-04-08 17:44:00] Dave: Yeah it’s pretty cool. There’s a whole community around it.
[2026-04-08 17:46:00] Sam Willis: I can see that!! lol
[2026-04-08 17:48:00] Sam Willis: Oh my god!
[2026-04-08 17:48:00] Sam Willis: It even does the sucking sensation?
[2026-04-08 17:48:00] Dave: Actually, I take that back. I have used the H2 because I remember that fast stroke.
[2026-04-08 17:48:00] Dave: The H1 couldn’t do that.
[2026-04-08 17:50:00] Dave: Audio Message.caf Transcription: So yeah, the way it works is somebody has to like it's called a fun script is what the file is called so the author or whoever somebody has to like this program for that you love the video and you go through and as like you set a point like with like a coordinate it's like uptown whatever And how far apart to determine the speed so you can do just like top to bottom is like up and down as one stroke but if you go like Feel like up up down and then up down up down up down like real fast like but not going very high. It just does like that vibration pattern so you can come up with all kinds of patterns. People have gotten like super creative with it and used like that quick. Short up and down motion for like kind of a vibration feeling Or putting that kind of stuff in the middle of various Other patterns it's pretty cool Oh, and the love vent one I think I read that that one actually uses AI or something and can sync with any video like with the fun scripts like the fun script has to be written for that video And there's different various software that like match them up and like the handy to connects I actually got both of them connect via Wi-Fi
[2026-04-08 17:51:00] Dave: There’s some serious Jack Off tech out there lol
[2026-04-08 18:39:00] Sam Willis: 🙃
[2026-04-08 18:40:00] Dave: Can confirm… after dealing with you all day
[2026-04-08 18:40:00] Dave: 😘😘😘
[2026-04-08 18:42:00] Sam Willis: And you love me!
[2026-04-08 18:43:00] Dave: You’re the absolute best 👸
[2026-04-08 18:45:00] Sam Willis: <no text>
[2026-04-08 18:45:00] Sam Willis: Hahahaha
[2026-04-08 18:45:00] Sam Willis: Lmao
[2026-04-08 18:46:00] Dave: And video and send it to myself ofc
[2026-04-08 18:46:00] Sam Willis: If you could live my life for a day, THAT’S what you’re gonna do?!? lol
[2026-04-08 18:46:00] Sam Willis: You are so funny and honestly that’s pretty genius
[2026-04-08 18:46:00] Dave: I’d see what you can handle
[2026-04-08 18:46:00] Sam Willis: So wait. Are you in my body? Like we are switching bodies?
[2026-04-08 18:46:00] Dave: Yeah
[2026-04-08 18:47:00] Sam Willis: Ok cause that changes things
[2026-04-08 18:47:00] Dave: Oh, what did you think it was?
[2026-04-08 18:48:00] Sam Willis: Hmmm well I’ve never had a dick before so I’d probably swing it around and get in one of those “sword” fights with another guy just to see how it is lmaoooo
[2026-04-08 18:48:00] Dave: Lmao
[2026-04-08 18:48:00] Dave: One of those sword fights
[2026-04-08 18:48:00] Dave: Hahaha love it
[2026-04-08 18:57:00] Sam Willis: What is the status of the box? Lol
[2026-04-08 18:59:00] Dave: <no text>
[2026-04-08 19:04:00] Sam Willis: Christian got approved for the place
[2026-04-08 19:04:00] Dave: Nice
[2026-04-08 19:04:00] Sam Willis: But it’s like a rushhhhh. Said he has to move in 2 weeks from TODAY
[2026-04-08 19:05:00] Sam Willis: He said he isn’t going to deal with it today. They have all these terms too. I can totally see him being like nah I’ll pass
[2026-04-08 19:06:00] Dave: What are your thoughts?
[2026-04-08 19:06:00] Dave: Do you want him to take it?
[2026-04-08 19:20:00] Sam Willis: Yes but I’m not getting my hopes up bc it’s way sooner than he wants
[2026-04-08 19:20:00] Sam Willis: The only thing he’s out at this point is a $50 application fee
[2026-04-08 19:20:00] Sam Willis: But it is a nice place!
[2026-04-08 19:21:00] Dave: Hmmm
[2026-04-08 19:21:00] Dave: I mean you could always be like: bro… you need to take it 🤨
[2026-04-08 19:22:00] Sam Willis: You know me. And you know that’s not something I’ll say
[2026-04-08 19:22:00] Dave: Oh 100%
[2026-04-08 19:22:00] Sam Willis: Honestly the thought of anyone having to be ready to move in TWO WEEKS gives me second hand anxiety lol
[2026-04-08 19:23:00] Sam Willis: Like that’s stressful!
[2026-04-08 19:23:00] Dave: Right but this isn’t out of the blue
[2026-04-08 19:23:00] Sam Willis: I know but do you think he’s started packing anything? Absolutely not
[2026-04-08 19:24:00] Dave: Ofc not, but will he have started a month from now when the NEXT place says “2 weeks”
[2026-04-08 19:25:00] Sam Willis: Yea you’re right
[2026-04-08 19:27:00] Dave: Well wait… He doesn’t have to be completely moved in in 2 weeks.
[2026-04-08 19:27:00] Dave: Just get the place and start moving in whenever
[2026-04-08 19:32:00] Sam Willis: Yea true
[2026-04-08 19:32:00] Sam Willis: So he needs to figure out what is due when. Money wise. Cause it’s either 2 or $4k in the next few weeks
[2026-04-08 19:33:00] Dave: Oof
[2026-04-08 19:33:00] Dave: Have you ever figured out wtf he spends his money on lol?
[2026-04-08 19:33:00] Dave: Since it ain’t fuckin rent to you
[2026-04-08 19:40:00] Sam Willis: Nope. I have no freaking idea
[2026-04-08 19:47:00] Sam Willis: Unrelated, but did you ever watch any documentaries about Warren Jeffs, the FLDS psycho? Anyway there’s a new one out about a new “prophet” that came around after Warren was in prison. But he was like a rogue prophet. I’m already hooked
[2026-04-08 19:47:00] Sam Willis: Has like 15 wives
[2026-04-08 19:48:00] Dave: Hahaha,, yeah I think I so
[2026-04-08 19:48:00] Dave: What is it called/on?
[2026-04-08 19:50:00] Sam Willis: Netflix
[2026-04-08 19:50:00] Sam Willis: And Trust Me: The False Prophet
[2026-04-08 19:51:00] Sam Willis: Also like, who the fuck can handle multiple wives or husbands?!? That sounds god fucking awful
[2026-04-08 19:59:00] Dave: Have you seen Wild Wild Country?
[2026-04-08 19:59:00] Dave: It’s about a guru/cult thing
[2026-04-08 20:00:00] Dave: It’s really good
[2026-04-08 20:01:00] Sam Willis: I haven’t seen that one! And I’m surprised bc I love this shit.
[2026-04-08 20:01:00] Sam Willis: Adding to my list!
[2026-04-08 20:06:00] Sam Willis: Omg this new “prophet” is such a jackass lmao
[2026-04-08 20:06:00] Dave: Aren’t they always lol
[2026-04-08 20:27:00] Dave: God damnit, I want to make love to you soooo badly it hurts 🥰🫠🥵
[2026-04-08 20:32:00] Sam Willis: I want that sooo much too!! ❤️❤️❤️
[2026-04-08 20:32:00] Sam Willis: I miss you so so much
[2026-04-08 20:32:00] Sam Willis: It’s been only 2 months and it has sucked lol
[2026-04-08 20:32:00] Dave: Soon 😘
[2026-04-08 20:32:00] Dave: Has it only?!
[2026-04-08 20:32:00] Dave: Omg
[2026-04-08 20:33:00] Dave: It feels like 2 YEARS 🤦‍♂️
[2026-04-08 20:40:00] Sam Willis: Hehehe
[2026-04-08 20:40:00] Sam Willis: Explicit pics!!!!
[2026-04-08 20:41:00] Sam Willis: 🤤🤤
[2026-04-08 20:42:00] Dave: Maybe we need to consider adjusting the… intensity… of afterglow photos after naked rendezvous 😏
[2026-04-08 20:44:00] Sam Willis: Possibly!
[2026-04-08 20:44:00] Dave: Hehehe
[2026-04-08 20:44:00] Sam Willis: <no text>
[2026-04-08 20:45:00] Dave: Maybe it would make it easier 🤷‍♂️
[2026-04-08 20:45:00] Dave: It’s in June, remember?
[2026-04-08 20:45:00] Dave: Maybe it would make it easier 🤷‍♂️
[2026-04-08 20:48:00] Sam Willis: It is??
[2026-04-08 20:48:00] Sam Willis: It is??
[2026-04-08 20:48:00] Sam Willis: I didn’t know that was a for sure? lol
[2026-04-08 20:48:00] Dave: Oh…
[2026-04-08 20:49:00] Dave: I’m sorry. I thought you loved me.
[2026-04-08 20:49:00] Dave: jk jk baby😜
[2026-04-08 20:50:00] Sam Willis: I definitely want to!! I just need to keep some of my PTO days for all the moving shit.
[2026-04-08 20:50:00] Dave: Well, if you get your house back…
[2026-04-08 20:51:00] Sam Willis: Butttt since I’m single, I can do weekend trips. 😜 but that’ll be harder for you
[2026-04-08 20:51:00] Dave: Oh wait, that doesn’t solve PTO lololol
[2026-04-08 20:51:00] Sam Willis: Like fly out on a Friday night and back home Sunday afternoon
[2026-04-08 20:52:00] Sam Willis: We will see
[2026-04-08 20:52:00] Sam Willis: You might not want to see me anymore after Naked Rendezvous 🤷‍♀️
[2026-04-08 20:52:00] Dave: WTF
[2026-04-08 20:53:00] Dave: I repeat….
[2026-04-08 20:53:00] Dave: Are you planning something I’m not going to like?!?!
[2026-04-08 20:53:00] Sam Willis: Like what?!?!
[2026-04-08 20:53:00] Dave: Idk…
[2026-04-08 20:53:00] Sam Willis: No fool
[2026-04-08 20:53:00] Dave: You tell me!!!
[2026-04-08 20:53:00] Sam Willis: I’m saying, maybe you won’t feel it anymore?!?
[2026-04-08 20:53:00] Dave: I repeat….
[2026-04-08 20:54:00] Dave: That’s crazy talk, silly girl 😘
[2026-04-08 20:57:00] Dave: But goes who’s going to bed early 😁😁
[2026-04-08 20:58:00] Sam Willis: Good job baby!
[2026-04-08 20:59:00] Sam Willis: Good night and sweet dreams and I love you so much
[2026-04-08 20:59:00] Dave: Mainly just in hopes my constant erection for you will go away for a little while 😅😝
[2026-04-08 20:59:00] Dave: I love you too princess 🥰😘
[2026-04-08 21:00:00] Sam Willis: Hahahaha
[2026-04-08 21:00:00] Sam Willis: Hahahaha
[2026-04-08 21:00:00] Dave: Fuuuck I can not wait to slide into you 🫠
[2026-04-08 21:00:00] Sam Willis: You’re the best ❤️
[2026-04-08 21:01:00] Dave: No u
[2026-04-08 21:01:00] Dave: No u
[2026-04-08 21:01:00] Sam Willis: We are getting so close!!
[2026-04-08 21:02:00] Sam Willis: <no text>
[2026-04-08 21:04:00] Dave:
[2026-04-08 21:05:00] Dave: You know I love you 👸
[2026-04-08 21:05:00] Sam Willis: I see that blur!!
[2026-04-08 21:05:00] Sam Willis: Love you so much baby. Sleep well
[2026-04-08 21:05:00] Dave: You too sweetiepie

The package came on a Tuesday, four days before he was due to fly out, and she was not supposed to open it until he told her she could.

That was the first rule. He'd texted it to her while she was still in the parking lot at work, still sitting in her car with the AC blasting and the headache from her one-on-one with fuckface still pulsing behind her left eye. A box is going to arrive at your door tomorrow. You do not open it until I say so. Understood?

She'd typed yes Sir with her thumb before she'd even parked.

Now it was Friday night, and the box had been sitting on her kitchen island for seventy-two hours, and she had walked past it approximately nine thousand times, and her phone was lit up on the counter beside it with his face on the screen.

"Hi," she said. Her voice was already wrong — already soft in the back, already that register she only used for him.

"Hi, baby." His drawl unhurried, his face lit by his own lamp, the familiar wall of his bedroom behind him. "You been good?"

"Yes, Sir."

"You haven't touched it."

"No, Sir."

"Look at you." A small smile. "Okay. Bring the phone into the bedroom. Prop it up where I can see you. All of you — from the knees up, on the bed. Take everything off first."

She did. She set the phone on the dresser, adjusted the angle twice, pulled the t-shirt — his, of course; one of the gym ones she'd never given back — over her head, stepped out of her underwear, and climbed onto the made bed. She sat on her heels the way he'd taught her. Her thighs were already slick against each other. She hadn't even touched the box yet and she was already wet.

"Good girl," he said, and she felt it hit her low in the belly like a dropped coin. "Now. Go get the box. Bring it to the bed. Don't open it yet."

She carried it back and knelt with it in front of her like an offering.

"Open it."

She slid her thumbnail under the tape. Inside, nested in tissue paper, was the Lovense — the one he'd described to her in excruciating detail on Wednesday morning, the small, curved, silicone thing she'd watched a review of twice and then closed her laptop and walked to the kitchen for water she didn't need. Next to it, a smaller box. A plug. Black, modest, tapered. A bottle of lube. A folded piece of paper in his handwriting.

"Read the note out loud."

She unfolded it. Her fingers weren't quite steady. Princess. Use the lube. Plug first, then the toy. I'll be controlling it from here. You don't come until I say. You don't close your legs. You don't ask me to hurry. Four more days. Tonight we practice. — D

"Four more days," she said, and her voice cracked on days, and he laughed — that low warm laugh she'd been earning for four years, the one that belonged to no one else.

"Lay back. Pillow under your hips. Knees up, feet flat, legs open. I want to see everything."

She obeyed. The overhead light was too bright; she could feel her own flush creeping up her chest, her nipples already drawn tight, her cunt already embarrassingly wet where the cool air met her. She didn't close her legs. She didn't cover her face, even though her first instinct was always to hide from the camera, and he always, always talked her out of it.

"There she is," he said quietly. "Jesus, Sam. Look at you."

"Sir."

"Lube on your fingers. Work it into your ass first. Slow. I want to watch."

She coated two fingers and reached down between her legs and pressed the first one against the tight ring of muscle and breathed out and pushed. It went in to the knuckle. She heard herself make a small noise — surprise, mostly; she was so wet and warm everywhere that the intrusion felt more intimate than uncomfortable.

"Good. One more."

A second finger. A stretch this time. Her hips tried to lift and she stopped them.

"That's it. That's my good girl. Now the plug. Lube the plug, not yourself. Press it in slow. If it's too much you tell me."

She took her fingers out and her body clenched around nothing and she almost whimpered. She slicked the plug. She positioned it. She pressed.

The taper went in easy and then there was the widest point and she held her breath and pushed past it and the base seated flush against her and her whole body jolted — a shiver that ran from her ass up through her belly and made her cunt contract hard around empty air.

"Oh," she said. "Oh — "

"Yeah?"

"It's — Sir, it's — "

"I know, baby. I know. Now the other one. Toy in your pussy. Curve up. All the way."

She was so wet it slid in without resistance, and the moment it was seated the weight of the plug in her ass seemed to double, and she could feel both of them against each other through the thin wall of her body, and she was suddenly, horrifyingly aware that she hadn't even been touched yet.

"Hands at your sides. Don't touch yourself. Don't close your legs. Breathe."

She lay there with both toys inside her, stretched in two places, his face watching her from the dresser, her own breath loud in her ears. Her lower belly was on fire. She thought of the Reddit post she'd sent him on Wednesday — choked, pulled, and bound — and thought of how far away he was, and how present, and how she couldn't have touched him if she tried and it didn't matter because he had her anyway.

"I'm going to turn it on," he said. "Low. You don't come."

The toy hummed to life against her g-spot and she arched off the bed and caught herself and settled back down with a sound that was half laugh and half sob.

"Too much?"

"No, Sir." She said it fast. "No — please — "

"Good girl. That's a low. Remember that."

He held her there. Three minutes, maybe four — she lost time almost immediately. The vibration was steady and unrelenting and the plug made everything she felt louder, and every time her hips tried to move he said, quietly, no, and she stilled, and her cunt clenched helplessly around the toy and pushed a fresh trickle of wet down between her cheeks onto the sheet.

"I can see you dripping," he said, almost conversational. "It's on the sheet. It's running down to your ass. You're a fucking mess, princess."

"Please."

"Please what."

"Please — " She didn't know. She didn't know what she was asking for. "Please, Sir, please, please — "

He bumped it up a setting. She cried out. Her hands fisted in the sheet at her sides and stayed there because he'd told them to.

"You remember what you said to me the other day?" His voice was still calm, still that low unhurried thing, and the contrast between his voice and what was happening in her body was going to kill her. "You said destroy me. You said use me however you want. You remember that?"

"Yes, Sir."

"I'm using you right now. I'm two thousand miles away and I'm using you. You understand that?"

"Yes — Sir — yes — "

"Higher."

He turned it up and her vision went briefly white at the edges. She was trembling all over. Her thighs were wet to the knee. She could hear herself — she was making a sound she had no control over, a thin continuous whine broken only when she had to breathe.

"You do not come," he said. "Do you understand me, Samantha. You do not come until I say."

"I can't — Sir, I can't, please, please, I can't — "

"You can. Because I say so. Because I am going to be inside you in four days and I want you out of your mind by the time I get there. I want you so wound up the second I touch you you fall apart. That's what this is for. Four days. Look at me."

She forced her eyes open. She hadn't realized she'd closed them. His face on the screen was perfectly steady, perfectly focused, and his eyes were on her eyes and she felt the tether between them go taut and hold.

"I love you," he said.

"I love you — "

"More."

" — more, Sir, I love you more — "

He turned it off.

The silence was so sudden it was almost violent. Her body was still vibrating with phantom feedback, her hips twitching involuntarily, her cunt clenching on the silent toy in ragged pulses like it was trying to finish the job itself. She was crying. She hadn't noticed that either. The tears were just running sideways into her hair.

"Breathe," he said softly. "Breathe, baby. Five counts in. Hold. Five counts out. With me."

She breathed with him.

"That's my girl. That's my good girl. Look at you. God, look at you, Sam. You did so good."

"I didn't come," she whispered. It came out half-proud, half-devastated.

"I know you didn't. I know. You were perfect. You held it."

"Can I — "

"No. Not tonight."

She made a sound that was almost a laugh, because of course. Of course not.

"Take the toys out. Slow. Plug last. Leave them on the towel, we'll clean them later."

She eased the toy out first, and the loss of it made her cunt spasm around nothing again, a hungry empty clutch. The plug came out with a slow, aching slide that made her whimper. She set them aside. Her hands were shaking.

"Under the covers."

She pulled the sheet up. Her legs wouldn't stop trembling. She drew her knees up and curled onto her side and the whole bed smelled like her, like sweat and arousal and something electric that hadn't discharged.

"Bring the phone close. On the pillow."

She did. His face filled the screen, inches from hers.

"Hi," he said. Different voice now. The after-voice. The one he used when she was like this — quieter, softer, closer.

"Hi."

"You okay?"

"Yeah." Her throat was wrecked. "Yeah. I'm — yeah."

"Tell me what you need."

She thought about it. It took a long time because her brain was moving like it was underwater. "Just — stay. Just like this."

"I'm staying."

"Four days."

"Four days, princess."

"I'm going to fucking die."

"You're not going to die." He was smiling. She could hear it before she could see it. "You're going to be unbearable to yourself for four days and then I'm going to be there and I'm going to be inside you so deep you forget your own name. That's the deal."

She closed her eyes. Her body was finally starting to settle, the aftershocks tapering into something warm and heavy and used. She could feel the wet cooling on her thighs. She could feel the ghost of the plug, the ghost of the toy, the ghost of his voice saying you do not come.

"I love you," she said into the pillow.

"I love you more."

"Not possible."

"Deeply untrue, but I'll let it go tonight."

She laughed — a real one, small, cracked at the edges. He watched her through the screen until her breathing slowed, until her hand stopped twitching against the pillow, until her eyes stayed closed a beat longer each time they fluttered, and he didn't hang up, and neither did she, and somewhere around the time the tremor in her thighs finally quieted she felt his voice, low and unhurried, say sleep, baby, I've got you, and she did.

The diving bell clanged against the hull at eleven fathoms, and Sam swore into her mouthpiece in a way that made Dave grin around his own regulator in the dark.

"Language, Virginia."

"You're not my mother."

"Thank Christ for that."

Their lamps cut yellow cones through the green-black water of the wreck's interior. The Maribel had gone down in '27 with a hold full of something the company wouldn't name on the salvage contract — something the company was paying them double hazard to retrieve before a storm system out of the Yucatán closed the window for the season. Four days of bottom time. They were on day four. They had six hours.

Dave moved ahead of her through what had been the purser's corridor, his fins barely disturbing the silt. She followed the breadth of his shoulders in the wetsuit, the way the neoprene pulled tight across his back, and thought — not for the first time that week — that there was something obscene about watching him work. The calm of him. The way his hands never hesitated on a latch or a line. Four years of diving with this man and she still forgot to breathe evenly when she watched him from behind.

They found the strongbox in the captain's quarters, wedged under a collapsed bulkhead. Dave worked the crowbar. Sam held the light. Her regulator hissed steady in her ears, and beneath the hiss she could hear her own pulse, low and insistent, the way it had been insistent for four days now — ever since Monday night in the wheelhouse when he'd pinned her against the chart table and told her, very quietly, exactly what he intended to do to her the moment they were back on dry land.

Four daaaaays, he'd said, like a kid counting down to Christmas, and she'd bitten his shoulder hard enough to bruise.

The box came free in a cloud of rust. Dave gave her the OK sign. She gave him back a sign that was not OSHA-approved, and he laughed into his regulator, a stream of bubbles rolling silver up the ceiling.

They surfaced at the dive platform of the Kestrel forty-five minutes later and the sky had gone the color of a old bruise. Wind coming hard out of the southeast. The deckhand — kid named Emerson, barely twenty, contracted out of Galveston — helped them shoulder out of their tanks and told them the storm had jumped forward six hours on the models. They were sitting it out. No choice. Anchor down, batten everything, ride it through.

"How long?" Dave asked, stripping the hood off his head. Bald, wet, grinning the particular grin of a man who had just done something difficult and done it well.

"Thirty hours, minimum. Maybe forty."

Sam was already unzipping her suit. "Well, fuck."

"Could be worse," Dave said.

"Could be."

She didn't look at him when she said it. She didn't need to.

The Kestrel was a seventy-footer with two cabins aft, and by the time the first squall lines hit they'd secured the hold, tied the strongbox into the dry locker, and sent Emerson to ride it out in the wheelhouse with the radio. Dave came down the companionway into the aft cabin and shut the door, and the door had a lock, and he turned it.

The boat was already pitching. Rain like thrown gravel against the portholes.

"Get over here," he said.

Sam had been peeling out of her base layer — the thermal half-zip damp with seawater, her hair still wet, salt crusted at her hairline. She looked up at him in the swinging cabin light and did not move.

"Make me," she said.

He crossed the cabin in two steps and she was already laughing, already reaching for him, and then his hand was in her hair at the back of her skull, closed tight, and the laugh stopped. Not because it hurt. Because of the way he did it. The way he always did it — like he was answering a question she'd been asking for four days straight.

"I've been thinking," he said, very close to her mouth, "about how deep."

"Have you."

"Mm-hm."

"Tell me."

He didn't. He kissed her instead, and the kiss was salt and neoprene and the particular metallic tang of a mouth that had been breathing bottled air for an hour, and she opened under it with a noise she would have been embarrassed about with anyone else. His other hand found the hem of her base layer and dragged it up over her ribs, over her breasts, over her head, and tossed it wet to the deck. The cabin swung. She swung with it. He steadied her against the bulkhead with his hip and his hand at her throat — not squeezing, just there, the heel of his palm against her pulse, and she felt every beat of it thump into his hand.

"Choke me," she said.

"You grumpy, Virginia?"

"I had a headache for three days. I want you to fuck it out of me."

His laugh was low and right against her ear. "That's a prescription I can fill."

His hand tightened. Not much. Just enough for her to feel the edges of it — the deliberate measure, the way he knew her throat the way a sailor knows a line, exactly how much tension, exactly when to ease. She sagged back against the bulkhead and her knees went soft and he caught her weight under one thigh and hoisted her up against the wood, her legs wrapping his hips, the damp wetsuit still clinging to him from the waist down.

She got her hands between them and yanked at the zipper on his suit. Got it down. Got her hand inside and around him, and he was already hard, already hot in her palm, the skin of him the hottest thing in a cabin gone cold with rain.

"Jesus," she whispered.

"I told you," he said. "Four days."

"I want my mouth on that."

"You'll get it. Not first."

"Dave —"

"Not first, sweetpea."

He set her down. He turned her around. He put one hand flat between her shoulder blades and pressed her down over the narrow bunk, and with the other hand he dragged her leggings and her underwear down her thighs in one motion, and she heard him make a sound behind her — a rough, short, exhaled fuck — that she would replay in her head the next time she was alone for a month.

"Look at you," he said.

"Shut up and —"

"Look at you."

He ran two fingers through her, slow, base to clit and back, and she was so wet his fingers made a sound against her that she heard over the rain. He made a low noise of approval. He did it again. He pushed two fingers into her and she bucked back onto his hand and swore into the blanket.

"That's my girl."

"Please —"

"I know, sweetpea."

He pulled his fingers out of her and she heard the wet suit hit the deck behind her, heard him kick out of it, heard the particular sound of a man stepping out of the last of his clothes in a hurry, and then his hand was back on her hip and the head of his cock was against her and he pushed in, and he didn't stop, and he didn't stop, and she felt him go in until she could feel the whole length of him against every inch of her and her face was in the blanket and she was saying his name like it was the only word she knew.

"Deep enough?" he said.

"Fuck —"

"That what you wanted?"

"Deeper."

He ground in. A slow, mean grind, his hips flush to her ass, and she felt the twitch of him inside her and the brush of his hand sweeping her hair off the back of her neck, gathering it, winding it once around his knuckles.

"Hold on," he said.

He fucked her against the bunk while the storm fucked the boat. She felt every swell through the hull — the slam of the bow, the roll, the long recovery — and he rode it, timed his strokes to it, used the pitch of the deck to drive into her at angles that made her see white. The boat lifted. He slammed in. The boat dropped. He pulled back to the tip. The boat lifted again and he was in her to the hilt and she was making sounds into the blanket that were not language, were not even really human, were just the open channel between her body and his.

He had her hair in one fist. The other hand came around and found her throat again, and this time he did squeeze — just enough, just the way she'd asked for — and her mouth fell open and she came around him with her face pressed into the wool and her whole body shaking like the mast in the wind.

He didn't let her come down. He pulled out of her — she whimpered — flipped her onto her back, got her legs up over his shoulders, and slid back into her in a single push that made her arch clean off the bunk. She could see him now. Bald, wet-mouthed, pupils gone black, a flush riding high on his cheekbones that she only ever saw here, in rooms like this, with her.

"Hi," he said, soft.

"Hi."

"I missed you."

"Don't stop."

"I'm not going to."

He fucked her slow. Then not slow. Her hands in his hand, pinned above her head. Her ankle against his ear. The rain against the porthole like a drummer losing time. He bent down and got his mouth on her breast and she felt his teeth and then his tongue and then his teeth again and she was already climbing back up toward another one, already gasping, already saying please please please into the top of his head, and he lifted up and looked at her and said —

"Tell me you're mine."

"I'm yours."

"Say it again."

"I'm yours, you bastard, I've always been yours —"

He came hard. She felt him lose his rhythm, felt him grind deep and hold, felt the warm flood of him inside her and the shudder that ran the whole length of his body, and she came again with him, a smaller aftershock wave that rolled her through and left her laughing weakly into his shoulder.

The boat pitched. They slid sideways on the bunk and neither of them cared.

After, he pulled the wool blanket over them and she put her head on his chest and listened to the storm and to his heartbeat, which was the only two sounds in the world.

"WAA alert," she mumbled.

"What."

"Weather anomaly announcement. Normal operations will resume shortly."

He laughed. The laugh went through his sternum into her ear.

"Tell me about your brother," he said, after a while.

"Oh god. Not now."

"Later."

"Later."

His hand moved slow on her back. The cabin light swung. The rain kept on.

"Thirty hours," she said.

"At least."

"Think we can fill it."

"I think we can make a start."

She tilted her face up. He was already looking down at her — like she was the only warm thing for a hundred miles, which, in the middle of the gulf in a hurricane, was more or less true.

"I love you," she said.

"I love you too, princess."

Outside, the wind rose. Inside, the boat held. He pulled her closer and she went, the way she always went, and neither of them slept for a long time.

The body shop on Route 50 smelled like primer and old coffee, and Dave had been sitting in the plastic chair for forty minutes pretending to read a pamphlet about paintless dent repair when his phone buzzed against his thigh.

stuck in a 1:1 with fuckface. save me

He smiled at the pamphlet. Typed back: can't. in the waiting room of emerson's purgatory. you're on your own, sweetpea.

Three dots. Then: dave he is literally still talking and i am literally going to combust

combust quietly. professionally.

i want to be a housewife. i want to fold your shirts and be stupid.

He laughed, out loud, and the guy across from him glanced up from his phone. Dave tipped his head in apology and turned his screen down on his knee. Outside the plate-glass window a kid in coveralls was backing Emerson's Civic into the bay, the bumper hanging like a loose tooth. He'd been up since six, had already run Emerson to the high school and back, and the whole morning had the off-kilter feeling of a day someone else planned for him. He'd left his coffee on the counter. He was going to be driving a teenager's schedule for two weeks. He should have been annoyed.

He wasn't. He was thinking about Sam's mouth.

Four days. He kept doing the math against himself like maybe if he recounted the hours they'd compress. He was flying out Tuesday. She'd be at the airport in that car she pretended was practical, wearing something that was going to ruin him the second she stood up from the driver's seat. He could already see it. He saw it all the time now, in the gaps between everything else, the way you keep touching a bruise to check if it still hurts.

His phone buzzed again.

link incoming. do not open at the body shop

He opened it at the body shop.

It was a Reddit post, one of those first-person things, and he skimmed the first three lines — choked, pulled, and bound — and closed the app like he'd opened a folder of classified documents. He looked up. The guy across from him was still on his phone. The TV was playing a commercial for a mattress. His ears were hot.

SAM.

told you

i am in public.

are you hard

He didn't answer. She knew. She always knew. He crossed his legs and stared at the pamphlet and made himself read one full sentence about how modern dent repair preserves factory paint. Then he typed, slow, deliberate:

when i get there tuesday i'm going to read that to you. out loud. you're not going to touch yourself until i tell you.

Dots. Dots. Dots.

oh.

oh?

ok. ok yes.

He watched the three dots appear and disappear and appear again like she was writing and deleting, writing and deleting, and he felt that specific pull in his chest that had nothing to do with being hard and everything to do with the fact that he could feel her from two thousand miles away, could see her sitting in that stupid glass conference room with her hand flat on her thigh, trying to breathe, trying to look like she was listening to fuckface monologue about Q2.

my lower belly is on fire, she sent finally. this is your fault.

yes.

i have to go back on camera in four minutes.

then go.

dave.

go, sweetpea. be good.

She sent a single emoji, the one with the little tongue, and he put his phone face down on his knee and stared out the window until the kid in coveralls came back and told him the Civic was going to be two weeks, minimum, and did he have a ride.

He had his own car. He'd driven it here. He thanked the kid and walked out into the parking lot and the April sun felt absurd on his face, too warm, too bright, everything too saturated, the way the world gets when you're thinking about someone so hard you forget to occupy your own body.

He called her at four, after she was off work, after he'd picked Emerson up and dropped him at his mother's and driven home with the windows down through the part of Virginia that still looked like Virginia, the dogwoods starting, the air soft.

She picked up on the second ring. "Hi."

"Hi."

"I took a bath."

"Yeah?"

"I was good. I didn't touch myself."

He pulled into his driveway and put the car in park and didn't get out. Bear was visible through the front window, paws on the sill, tail already going. "Good girl."

He heard her breath change. That small catch he'd learned over four years to listen for, the way a person learns a piece of music. She made a sound that wasn't a word.

"You okay?"

"I'm — yeah. I'm. Dave."

"Tell me."

"I'm in the grey shirt."

"Which one."

"Yours. The soft one. The one I stole."

"You didn't steal it. I left it."

"You left it on purpose."

"I left it on purpose."

A laugh, small, real. He could hear her moving, the rustle of something, sheets maybe, or the couch. He pictured her on the couch in the back room, bare legs tucked under her, the shirt too big at the neck, her hair still damp. He pictured the specific way she sat when she was on the phone with him, one knee up, the other foot flat on the cushion, an old jean jacket posture, fifteen-year-old Sam in thirty-six-year-old Sam's body.

"Four days," she said.

"Four days."

"I'm not going to make it."

"You're going to make it."

"Dave."

"Sam."

She laughed again, and then her voice went quieter, the way it did when she was about to say something she'd been thinking about for a while. "I was reading that thing again."

"Mm."

"The part about — "

"I know the part."

"I want that. I don't know if I want all of it. But I want you to — I want you to put your hand on my throat. Not hard. Just. There."

He closed his eyes. Bear was barking at the window now, muffled through the glass. "Yes."

"And I want — " She stopped. "I've been thinking about the plug. The one you sent me the link to."

"Yeah."

"I bought it."

He opened his eyes. "When."

"Tuesday. It got here Thursday. It's in my nightstand."

"Sam."

"I haven't used it. I was saving it."

"For what."

"For you. For when you — for when you're inside me. I want you inside me and something in my ass at the same time. I want to feel — I want to feel how deep you can go when I'm that full."

He was out of the car. He didn't remember deciding to get out of the car. He was walking up his own front steps with his phone pressed to his ear and his other hand shaking against the storm door. Bear exploded out the second he cracked it open, shouldering past his knee, and he let him, he let the dog thunder past him into the yard because his whole body was elsewhere.

"Dave?"

"I'm here."

"Did I break you."

"Yes."

"Good."

He went inside. He didn't turn on the lights. He sat down on the edge of his bed with his shoes still on and he heard her breathing and he said, quiet, "Take the shirt off."

"Okay."

"You have it?"

"Yes."

"The plug."

"Yes."

"Get it."

He listened to her move. He listened to the drawer. He listened to her come back to the phone and breathe once, not quite steady.

"Dave, I — "

"I know. I'm not going to make you use it now. I want you to hold it."

"Hold it."

"In your hand. So you know it's real. So you know Tuesday is real."

She made that sound again, the one from earlier, the one that wasn't a word. He heard her lie back. He heard the shift of her against the pillows, the soft exhale that meant her shoulders had dropped.

"Touch yourself," he said.

"You said I couldn't."

"I'm saying you can."

"Say it right."

He almost laughed. She was going to kill him. "Touch your cunt, Sam."

"Okay."

"Slow. Tell me."

"I'm — god, I'm so wet, I've been wet since the conference room, I've been — "

"I know."

"Dave, I can't — "

"You can. Slow. Two fingers."

He heard her, the wet sound, muffled by phone and distance but unmistakable, the specific slick rhythm that was only hers. He had his own hand on himself through his jeans and he wasn't even moving it, he was just holding himself, letting her voice do the work.

"Tell me what you want Tuesday," he said.

"I want you to fuck me so deep I can't breathe. I want — I want you to put your hand on my throat and tell me I'm yours and I want the plug in and I want — Dave, I want to come with you that full in me, I want to feel every — "

"You'll feel every inch. I promise."

"Promise."

"Every inch, sweetpea. As deep as I can go. Four days."

"Four days."

"Faster. Come on."

"I'm — "

"I've got you. Come on. Let me hear you."

She came with a sound he'd only ever heard from her, a specific note that caught in her throat like she was trying not to and failing, and he listened to it all the way through, every shudder, every half-word, until her breathing went long and ragged and she said his name once, just once, flat and soft, like she was laying it down somewhere to keep.

He hadn't touched himself. He was so hard his jeans hurt. He didn't care. He was saving it.

"Dave."

"I'm here."

"You didn't."

"No."

"Tuesday."

"Tuesday."

A long pause. Bear was barking at something in the yard. The room was nearly dark now. He lay back on the bed with his shoes still on and looked at the ceiling and listened to her breathe on the other end of the line.

"Hi," she said, eventually.

"Hi."

"I love you."

"I love you too, princess."

"The dog's going crazy out there."

"He's fine."

"Go get your dog, Dave."

"In a minute."

"In a minute," she agreed. And they stayed on the phone a little longer, not saying much, the line open between Virginia and Arizona like a wire strung taut across the whole tired country, humming.

DAY OVERVIEW Today was a Friday marked by a playful, flirtatious morning that transitioned into a sexually charged midday, with the most defining moment being their explicit discussion of sexual fantasies and plans for an upcoming intimate encounter. The day ended on a tender, loving note as they expressed their longing for each other and made plans to see each other soon.

TOPIC INVENTORY

  • Morning Routine Disruption
  • Dave explained a disruption in his morning routine due to needing to take Emerson's car to the body shop.
  • Emotional register: Playful, affectionate

  • Notable quotes: "Good morning sunshine... Nothing to be alarmed about"

  • Sam's Brother and Ex-Wife Drama

  • Sam asked Dave to remind her to tell him about her brother and his ex-wife.
  • Emotional register: Curious, empathetic

  • Notable quotes: "Remind me to tell you about my brother and his ex wife"

  • Work and Meetings

  • Sam expressed frustration with her work schedule, especially the numerous meetings.
  • Emotional register: Frustrated, overwhelmed

  • Notable quotes: "I’m grumpy. Hmph. I love you."

  • TV Show Recommendations

  • Dave recommended several TV shows, including "Ozark" and "The Shield."
  • Emotional register: Enthusiastic, sharing

  • Notable quotes: "You should watch it. It's it's all around"

  • Emerson's Car Situation

  • Dave mentioned he would be driving Emerson to and from work while his car is being fixed.
  • Emotional register: Accepting, matter-of-fact

  • Notable quotes: "So that's gonna suck for however who knows how long that's gonna be probably a week or two"

  • Sam's Headache and Workday

  • Sam mentioned having a headache and struggling with her workday, including a 1x1 meeting with someone she refers to as "fuckface."
  • Emotional register: Painful, frustrated

  • Notable quotes: "I’m having a mid life crisis I swear."

  • Brother's Ex-Wife's Affairs

  • Sam shared detailed information about her brother's ex-wife having multiple affairs and the fallout from this revelation.
  • Emotional register: Shocked, empathetic

  • Notable quotes: "She had like eight affairs on him at least. Probably more"

  • Christian's Housing Situation

  • Sam updated Dave on Christian's application for a new house and the rush to move in within two weeks.
  • Emotional register: Anxious, supportive

  • Notable quotes: "He said he isn’t going to deal with it today. They have all these terms too."

  • Documentaries and Cults

  • Sam mentioned a new documentary about a "false prophet" and discussed other documentaries about cults and gurus.
  • Emotional register: Interested, sharing

  • Notable quotes: "I’m already hooked"

  • Sexual Fantasies and Plans

  • Dave and Sam discussed their sexual desires, including specific acts and fantasies they want to explore.
  • Emotional register: Aroused, playful, loving

  • Notable quotes: "I would be happy to oblige, except maybe with a butt plug, just to have something in your ass too"

  • Lovense Device

  • Dave explained the features and capabilities of a Lovense device, including how it can be controlled via an app.
  • Emotional register: Excited, informative

  • Notable quotes: "There’s a whole community around it."

  • Future Plans and Longing

  • Dave and Sam expressed their longing for each other and made plans to see each other soon, including potential weekend trips.
  • Emotional register: Loving, anticipatory
  • Notable quotes: "Soon 😘"

SEXUAL & PHYSICAL CONTENT - Dave and Sam discussed various sexual acts and fantasies, including choking, pulling hair, and using a butt plug. - Sam initiated the discussion by sharing a Reddit link to a sexual scenario she found appealing. - Specific language: "choked, pulled, and bound," "deeeeppp you stick your cock into me," "I’m just thinking about how deeeeppp you stick your cock into me." - Physical sensations mentioned: "My lower belly is on fire just reading that," "I am soooo looking forward to getting in there as deep as I can in only 4 daaaaays!" - Toys referenced: butt plug, Lovense device, Fleshlight

EMOTIONAL DYNAMICS - Sam led the conversation about her frustrations with work and her brother's drama, while Dave provided support and empathy. - There was a playful, flirtatious dynamic throughout the day, with both initiating and escalating sexual topics. - Expressions of love and longing were prominent, with both frequently expressing their affection and desire for each other. - Power-dynamic moments included Sam being playful and bratty, while Dave was supportive and loving. - There were no significant tensions or misunderstandings; the dynamic was generally positive and affectionate.

MEMORABLE LANGUAGE - "WAA ALERT Morning routine has been disrupted. Please expect delays on morning voice message. No action is necessary on your part. Normal operations will resume shortly. END OF ALERT" — Dave, setting the tone for the day - "I absolutely cannot wait until I no longer have to deal with pain in the ass, inconsiderate, teenagers" — Sam, expressing frustration with her teenagers - "I swear to God this piece of shit anyway, I don't remember. I don't know exactly where I'm coming off, but I was talking about Lily Allen and I think it's David Harbour and the cheating and the revenge album and all that sort of stuff." — Sam, rambling about a documentary - "I think he's being dramatic about how she pissed everyone in what seeker off although it is a small fucking town but anyway" — Sam, discussing her brother's ex-wife - "I would fucking die" — Sam, reacting to her brother's text about his ex-wife - "I am soooo looking forward to getting in there as deep as I can in only 4 daaaaays!" — Dave, expressing sexual anticipation - "I want my mouth on that SO BADLY" — Sam, reacting to Dave's explicit photo - "I can so destroy me. Use me however you want" — Sam, in a moment of sexual submission - "I repeat…. Are you planning something I’m not going to like?!?!" — Dave, playfully teasing Sam about their upcoming encounter - "I love you too princess" — Dave, ending the day on a tender note

CONTINUITY HOOKS - Unresolved topics: Christian's housing situation and the potential move. - Plans mentioned: An upcoming intimate encounter, potential weekend trips. - Emotional threads left open: Their longing for each other and the anticipation of their next meeting. - Running jokes or references refreshed today: The "WAA" situation, their playful banter about sexual acts and fantasies. - State of mood at end of day: Loving, anticipatory, and slightly playful.

MOOD MAP nervous anticipation → giddy flirtation → raw heat → post-orgasm tenderness → wistful longing → playful teasing → loving anticipation

================================================================================ INSIGHTS REPORT FOR 2026-04-08 Generated: 2026-04-17 12:49:54 Status: success Schema Version: 1.2.0 ================================================================================

METRICS

  • ⏱ Response Time --- Me→Them: 171s ↑19% vs 7d avg Them→Me: 142s ↓8% vs 7d avg

  • ✅ Conflicts & Repair --- Conflicts: 21 ↓ (avg 24.0 this week) Repair Rate: 100.0% →0% vs 7d avg Avg Recovery: 11.7 min ↓30% vs 7d avg

  • ⚖ Initiation --- Balance Ratio: 1.00 ↑40% vs 7d avg Cold Starts: 1 ↓ (avg 1.6 this week) 1 me / 0 them

  • ⚡ Velocity & Sessions --- High Velocity %: 99.3% →1% vs 7d avg Sessions: 28 ↑ (avg 27.9 this week) Avg Duration: 11.5 min ↑25% vs 7d avg

  • 💬 Message Volume --- Total Messages: 411 ↑ (avg 333.9 this week) From Me: 199 ↑ (avg 148.0 this week) From Them: 212 ↑ (avg 185.9 this week) With Signals: 398 ↑ (avg 323.0 this week)

SENDER COVERAGE

Sender Labeled / Total Rate Top Labels
Dave 196 / 199 98.5% status_update (68), humor (53), flirting (15), affection (14), excitement (13)
Sam Willis 202 / 212 95.3% status_update (45), humor (31), checking_in (20), excitement (20), vulnerability (20)

DOMINANT LABEL

status_update (5th day in a row )

  • 🏷 Label Counts ---

    • status_update: 103 (avg score: 62%)
    • humor: 75 (avg score: 70%)
    • excitement: 32 (avg score: 77%)
    • affection: 28 (avg score: 80%)
    • frustration: 28 (avg score: 66%)
    • flirting: 27 (avg score: 81%)
    • checking_in: 26 (avg score: 66%)
    • vulnerability: 24 (avg score: 67%)
    • sexting: 20 (avg score: 89%)

  • 🏷 Label Counts (cont.) ---

    • emotional_support: 14 (avg score: 65%)
    • planning: 12 (avg score: 75%)
    • request: 10 (avg score: 66%)
    • deep_sharing: 6 (avg score: 81%)
    • disagreement: 6 (avg score: 65%)
    • appreciation: 5 (avg score: 72%)
    • encouragement: 5 (avg score: 70%)
    • unmet_need: 4 (avg score: 68%)
    • passive_aggression: 1 (avg score: 60%)

ANOMALIES

Unusual Pattern

Unmet Need surged 140.0% vs 7-day average

Unusual Pattern

Excitement surged 62.3% vs 7-day average

Unusual Pattern

Sexting surged 150.0% vs 7-day average

PROVENANCE

Signals Prompt Version: signals.v2 Signals Model: unknown Rollup Computed At: N/A

================================================================================

Relationship Balance

Signal Flow Over Time

Conversation Topics