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2026-03-12

Perfect Repair Day

All 26 conflicts resolved — avg recovery 4 min, max 35 min, 0 unresolved.

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[2026-03-12 06:24:00] Dave: For your feedback when you get a chance to review…
[2026-03-12 06:37:00] Dave: Audio Message.caf Transcription: Good morning sunshine I hope you slept well and woke up gently and the dogs didn't bother you too much last night And I hope you're in the best mood you've been in all week when you wake up I know you will be, but if not, that's fine. You know I love whatever boo you're in they all have their wonderful benefits. So yeah, there is some space trap and that one story which I am a part of what I've been working on with that is Keeping one like that it's called an SFWNSFW one and two in my back end, but I think it translates to With the labels to corn and it's kind of romantic So those are each one of those are separate prompts so the porn prompt is basically the same. It's it's upgraded, but it's kind of the same real life story type thing. It should be upgraded though as well but That smart or NSF W-2 is Like fantasy stuff like being out in space or you know spies or some shit like that so I'm waiting to see how that works. It should rotate it should bring in context from the day before. And use a different writing style or different scenario to keep it like rotating through fresh scenes. Also, we'll see how that works and then the romantic one is what I just sent you a copy of the test. It's not actually romantic. For me, maybe it is I skipped it but it's a different Different Genre I guess the word so yeah let me know how you like that when you get a chance, it's not depress obviously So that's soft copy Oh, you should also check out the narratives and the narrative in the view of sections, cause we're both upgraded too Yeah I slept pretty well I think woke up early for And then of course There are a couple times in the night there was cleaning up against me, but he's been sleeping on the floor or out of the bed rotate and if I wake up, I'll kind of check out and see where he's at usually Constance says hi he sees me looking around Yeah, headed to work for Thursday. Feels like a fucking Tuesday still. I know I'll get you since four days. I just wish the fuck up and happen. I'm not telling you nothing that you've been doing it for ever but of course that's why you make the big bugs. I'm just a lovely little peon. I really need to get on the fucking ball with this other job thing. I guess important as I made to help because I haven't taken any action towards it and still interested. I just gotta get my gear I guess. Yeah, that's that's my day so far Hope you have a great morning. You're not rushed. Get up on time and get out the door. It just kicked back on your ride to work. Listen to this message and listen to some murder podcast. And I'll be thinking about you can't wait to talk to you today
[2026-03-12 07:05:00] Dave: My mornings 😊
[2026-03-12 08:30:00] Sam Willis: Good morning baby. I’ll listen to your message soon. ❤️ I’m not going to go to work today. Rough night. Tossed and turned, slept like shit. Cried myself to sleep (wtf 🙄), lots of feels, and now I’m basically just dead inside. Soooo yea 🤷‍♀️ going to take a self care day.
[2026-03-12 08:31:00] Dave: Awwwwe, sweetie 🥺🤗
[2026-03-12 08:31:00] Dave: I’m glad you’re taking the day off
[2026-03-12 08:33:00] Dave: Fill me in whenever you’re ready, and if you want. Not pressure 🙏
[2026-03-12 08:45:00] Sam Willis: How are you doing?
[2026-03-12 08:46:00] Dave: I’m good! And full of bandwidth 😌😉
[2026-03-12 08:46:00] Dave: I mean… I’m at work. So that’s dumb. But ooooootherwise 😜
[2026-03-12 08:51:00] Sam Willis: I’m going to chalk everything up to just hormones
[2026-03-12 08:53:00] Dave: Oh I’m sure. But don’t discount the feelings themselves. The hormones just turn the volume up on what’s already there.
[2026-03-12 08:55:00] Dave: And thank you for telling me how you feel. I love knowing what’s going on in there 🥰
[2026-03-12 08:57:00] Sam Willis: lol even I do not know wtf is going on in there
[2026-03-12 08:59:00] Dave: I got you 😉
[2026-03-12 09:25:00] Sam Willis: I watched that stupid love is blind reunion, and for some reason, seeing these people so emotional about their relationships made me feel strong feelings about how unhappy I am in mine and how I want what these people have (even though I’m sure its all total bullshit). And then a few of them talked about how they had to take the time to really work on themselves, and how they did so much work the past year or whatever to really love themselves, focus on their happiness, etc. and so that made me sad bc I know I’ve lost myself and my own happiness. Then I had a platypus moment hit me in a big way that made me really sad and disappointed. Then literally almost everything that Christian says just shows me how different we are, and I feel so trapped, then I get so stressed thinking about what all it would take and how life would look if we broke up, so that was overwhelming. Then he could see I was in a bad mood before I went to sleep, so he was laying there rubbing my back as I had my back to him. And I literally just wanted him to go away, which of course makes me feel like a shitty human being. But I just want to be alone. But do I REALLY want to be alone??? What if the loneliness is even “louder” than it was after Chaz died? For some reason, being alone now sounds even more scary than it ever did. And I can’t pinpoint why that is? Maybe it’s bc I already feel so at capacity with life. Now how would I do it all alone? Away from the house 10 hrs a day. So many needy dogs. I’d need and want to find a WFH job. Then I’d want to move. And it all just seems so overwhelming. And just how tf did I even get here?!?
[2026-03-12 09:47:00] Sam Willis: Transcription: I thought I'd just send a message real quick. I'm gonna go back to sleep soon if I can, but I wanted to message about the platypus moment because I'm sure you're curious but I don't want you to feel bad about it. And there's nothing for you to fix or say or do it just was a thought I had But again, it's not about you And I don't want you to feel bad about it. This is like a me thing, but it like hit me that. And we probably talked about this before, but like my core belief underneath all of my bullshit is that I'm not worthy and so I have a pattern of getting myself into these relationships That I How am I trying to get into these relationships that aren't the right relationships and then I tell myself well if I do XYZ then You know he will love me enough to fix XYZ because I'm because he loves me because I'm worth it and then of course when it goes to shit then it just perpetuates my underlying belief that I'm not worthy which is really not the case. It's just a stupid fucking pattern I have but like for example. Chaz well, if I just fucking do everything for him to tee up this divorce then he'll get a divorce because he actually wants to be with me or I don't know if like basically I try to fix people Because I think that I'll be worth fixing, I'll be worth them fixing themselves for does this make sense? I'm sorry I'm so tired anyway how this ties back to you and I was like. I hope I'm not deep down Going to one day be like well He never left Juliet to be with me because I'm not worth it like I just don't wanna like set myself up for being in this impossible situation where like Like I know it's not gonna be what I wanted to be and so do I put myself in these situations just to perpetuate this story I tell myself about myself does that makes sense? It made a lot of sense in my head but now hearing it out loud it's not not clicking like it did but it it like hit me like a freaking wrecking ball last night or I was like wow I'm just repeating a pattern and I'm setting myself up to feel Like shit about myself again Anyway OK, well for real I don't want you to feel Any sort of way about this? I'm just talking to you and telling you and being honest with you and There's nothing that you need to fix and Ginger is giving me a kiss right now so that's very nice of her All right, I'm going to attempt to sleep which probably won't happen, but I will talk to you later
[2026-03-12 10:01:00] Dave: That makes perfect sense. I understand exactly what you’re saying, and its all entirely valid, and honestly, not unexpected. I’m formulating a response (and actually having to do some work 🙄). But Not fixing, not offended, not hurt. Just here, as your friend 🤗
[2026-03-12 10:01:00] Sam Willis: No rush at all
[2026-03-12 10:03:00] Dave: Get some rest if you can ☺️
[2026-03-12 10:03:00] Sam Willis: I already gave up. Going to take the assholes on walks
[2026-03-12 10:38:00] Dave: Ha! Fucking shows edited to evoke emotion 🙄. That all makes perfect sense though, and the fact that you were able to see that pattern says a lot about you. I’m not saying you shouldn’t go back to therapy, but in my opinion, you appear to be having the exactly appropriate feelings for your situation. And most importantly recognizing what they’re telling you. I know you said I didn’t have to say anything but Im going to anyway. And I also know that you can’t help feeling the way you do no matter what I say. Waves arms around (and pre-WWA) has never been a test of your worth. You don’t have to prove anything, fix anything, or earn anything from me. I saw everything I needed to see from the moment I met you. And you are entirely worthy. Not just of me, but of better. I also really appreciate you trusting me enough to say that out loud. That kind of honesty is exactly what keeps WWA healthy, and helps us determine exactly what it needs to be.
[2026-03-12 11:41:00] Sam Willis: https://www.instagram.com/lucy.milgrim/reel/DVmJs73CVK-/ Lucy Milgrim on Instagram 18M views, 2M likes, 32K comments: "New PR at The Arnold! With sincere...
[2026-03-12 11:42:00] Sam Willis: This child is not fuckin around 😳
[2026-03-12 12:11:00] Dave: HOLLLLLY
[2026-03-12 12:11:00] Dave: What a savage
[2026-03-12 12:11:00] Dave: Idek of I could DL that much lolol
[2026-03-12 12:20:00] Sam Willis: She’s a beast! Good for her 💪
[2026-03-12 12:21:00] Dave: Hell yeah. I love her hype and routine 😠
[2026-03-12 12:26:00] Sam Willis: I love her spotters face lol.
[2026-03-12 12:27:00] Sam Willis: How are you doing? How is work?
[2026-03-12 12:28:00] Dave: I’m good 🙂
[2026-03-12 12:28:00] Dave: Work is… work
[2026-03-12 12:30:00] Dave: Not loving all this ooo symbol but I’ll let it go this time 😜
[2026-03-12 12:30:00] Dave: LMAO
[2026-03-12 12:31:00] Dave: Sam Willis… she is a shit
[2026-03-12 12:31:00] Sam Willis: Hahahaha
[2026-03-12 12:32:00] Sam Willis: I was like wait, how did you do that?!? But now I remember it’s the last thing I sent to you
[2026-03-12 12:32:00] Sam Willis: That is hilarious
[2026-03-12 12:32:00] Dave: Hahaha, right?!
[2026-03-12 12:32:00] Dave: How often does that happen
[2026-03-12 12:32:00] Sam Willis: Do you know how much OOO I’ve put up with, with you?!? 🙄
[2026-03-12 12:33:00] Dave: Yes, I do. You’re a saint 🙏
[2026-03-12 12:33:00] Dave: What are you up to?
[2026-03-12 12:35:00] Sam Willis: Just took a shower and now hoping to nap but we will see.
[2026-03-12 12:36:00] Sam Willis: Still in a shitty mood.
[2026-03-12 12:36:00] Sam Willis: I’m glad you’re having a good day!
[2026-03-12 12:39:00] Dave: Yeah i figured 😕.
[2026-03-12 12:39:00] Dave: Yeah i figured 😕.
[2026-03-12 12:40:00] Dave: I’m sorry
[2026-03-12 12:40:00] Dave: If you want to talk, you know I’m here sweetie
[2026-03-12 12:40:00] Dave: I’m sorry
[2026-03-12 12:40:00] Dave: If you want to talk, you know I’m here sweetie
[2026-03-12 15:19:00] Sam Willis: Just got up, so that was nice!! I’m so confused bc Christian was supposed to leave 2 hrs ago to run errands. Doesn’t look like he ever did 🙄 and then now he’s supposed to be upstairs on his therapy appointment and I think they’re already done after 15 min. I’m so confused. Whatevs. I should really go check my work stuff. I really really don’t want to. What are you up to?
[2026-03-12 15:19:00] Sam Willis: Do you have anything funny to share to bring me joy?? Lmao
[2026-03-12 15:19:00] Sam Willis: (I don’t rely on you at ALL to better my moods) 🙄😅
[2026-03-12 15:20:00] Dave: I was just thinking about you!
[2026-03-12 15:20:00] Dave: Don’t go check work
[2026-03-12 15:21:00] Dave: There’s nothing there that can’t wait until tomorrow.
[2026-03-12 15:22:00] Sam Willis: I’ve been thinking about you, too.
[2026-03-12 15:23:00] Sam Willis: I think I’m going to cancel my workout class tonight
[2026-03-12 15:23:00] Dave: Oh?
[2026-03-12 15:23:00] Sam Willis: To the first thing or the second thing? Lol
[2026-03-12 15:23:00] Sam Willis: To the first thing or the second thing? Lol
[2026-03-12 15:24:00] Dave: <no text>
[2026-03-12 15:25:00] Dave: Oh and I’m glad you got a good nap in!
[2026-03-12 15:27:00] Sam Willis: Did you get a nap in?
[2026-03-12 15:27:00] Sam Willis: And I’m always thinking of you
[2026-03-12 15:27:00] Sam Willis: Duh
[2026-03-12 15:30:00] Sam Willis: Do you think it’s weird (not the right word, but can’t think of it) when I have these random couple days a month where I just become a shell and go mostly quiet for a whole day?
[2026-03-12 15:30:00] Dave: Yeah I laid down for about 30 mins. Had to force it. I wasn’t really sleepy. Tired, but not sleepy. I was mostly freezing lol, which is why I did it
[2026-03-12 15:30:00] Dave: Not at all
[2026-03-12 15:30:00] Dave: I don’t think they’re random
[2026-03-12 15:34:00] Dave: They’re tied to your cycle, which I think is the straw that breaks the camels back every month. You carry so much at work dealing with people and bullshit, you’re a trapped bird at home, and you have me hanging over you showing you what could be but isn’t.
[2026-03-12 15:35:00] Dave: That’s a lot of buildup
[2026-03-12 15:37:00] Sam Willis: You aren’t hanging over me!
[2026-03-12 15:38:00] Sam Willis: But yes on everything else. Blahhhh I’m just fucking sad
[2026-03-12 15:38:00] Dave: I wish I was 😏
[2026-03-12 15:38:00] Sam Willis: Hehe meee tooooo!
[2026-03-12 15:38:00] Sam Willis: Everything feels so so heavy
[2026-03-12 15:38:00] Sam Willis: Hehe meee tooooo!
[2026-03-12 15:39:00] Dave: WAA adds a layer of stress and sadness (as well as joy and happiness - but that doesn’t erase the former)
[2026-03-12 15:39:00] Dave: WAA adds a layer of stress and sadness (as well as joy and happiness - but that doesn’t erase the former)
[2026-03-12 15:40:00] Dave: It’s all very heavy stuff, and should feel that way.
[2026-03-12 15:40:00] Dave: It’s all very heavy stuff, and should feel that way.
[2026-03-12 15:41:00] Dave: I think the regular you is so strong and capable that this ebb in hormonal stability makes allthethings feel that much heavier when you’re out of whack for those couple days.
[2026-03-12 15:41:00] Dave: I think the regular you is so strong and capable that this ebb in hormonal stability makes allthethings feel that much heavier when you’re out of whack for those couple days.
[2026-03-12 15:42:00] Dave: Sorry if you’re not ready for my default settings analytics 🫣
[2026-03-12 15:43:00] Sam Willis: I love them
[2026-03-12 15:43:00] Dave: No fixing though!! 😋
[2026-03-12 15:43:00] Sam Willis: I love them
[2026-03-12 15:43:00] Sam Willis: But I also feel like I’m a massive drain on you
[2026-03-12 15:44:00] Sam Willis: Does WAA add a layer of stress and sadness to you, too?
[2026-03-12 15:44:00] Sam Willis: So that’s a big reason why I go mostly quiet on these days bc who the fuck wants to hear me say the same shittttt over and over and over again
[2026-03-12 15:44:00] Sam Willis: Does WAA add a layer of stress and sadness to you, too?
[2026-03-12 15:45:00] Dave: Ofc you feel that way. But as explained ad nausea, this is what I’m built for baby.
[2026-03-12 15:45:00] Dave: Ofc you feel that way. But as explained ad nausea, this is what I’m built for baby.
[2026-03-12 15:48:00] Dave: Some sadness. I want to be close to you. Always. So ofc that gets to me at times.
[2026-03-12 15:48:00] Dave: But the joy and love outweighs.
[2026-03-12 15:48:00] Dave: Some sadness. I want to be close to you. Always. So ofc that gets to me at times.
[2026-03-12 15:48:00] Dave: But the joy and love outweighs.
[2026-03-12 15:50:00] Sam Willis: <no text>
[2026-03-12 15:50:00] Sam Willis: <no text>
[2026-03-12 15:51:00] Dave: It really isn’t. You’re still the you I love moody or not.
[2026-03-12 15:51:00] Dave: It really isn’t. You’re still the you I love moody or not.
[2026-03-12 15:52:00] Dave: Remember, you’re more right now lol
[2026-03-12 15:52:00] Dave: Even yourself apparently
[2026-03-12 15:57:00] Dave: I think that’s just how you justify it because you feel bad for not talking to me as much. And you probably do WANT to talk to me but the fact of the matter is your body and brain just need to chill, and that’s what it does - cutting off external communications. Which is totally normal and fine.
[2026-03-12 16:01:00] Sam Willis: It’s pretty much exactly this. And once again, it’s both annoying and amazing that you know me so well and can articulate that’s how I’m feeling bc I can’t. 🙄❤️
[2026-03-12 16:01:00] Sam Willis: It’s pretty much exactly this. And once again, it’s both annoying and amazing that you know me so well and can articulate that’s how I’m feeling bc I can’t. 🙄❤️
[2026-03-12 16:02:00] Dave: 😉😘
[2026-03-12 16:02:00] Sam Willis: I’m not justifying it though. I am truly sick of myself and don’t want to be a drain on you. Or anyone. Bc I am draining to myself
[2026-03-12 16:02:00] Sam Willis: But anyway I love you.
[2026-03-12 16:02:00] Sam Willis: When are YOU going to be a pain in the ass?? So I can be there for you.
[2026-03-12 16:03:00] Sam Willis: That was another thing I thought about while walking the dogs this morning: that you pour sooooo much into me and WAA. And I just feel like the beneficiary and that it’s one sided. 😭
[2026-03-12 16:03:00] Dave: You’re there for me more than you know.
[2026-03-12 16:03:00] Sam Willis: Omg it’s the whole fucking “not worthy” narrative. I’m going to throw my phone across the room.
[2026-03-12 16:04:00] Dave: It’s exactly that.
[2026-03-12 16:04:00] Dave: It’s not one sided at all. I get soooo much from you!
[2026-03-12 16:04:00] Sam Willis: I’m going to find a therapist.
[2026-03-12 16:04:00] Dave: That’s a good Segway….
[2026-03-12 16:04:00] Dave: That’s a good Segway….
[2026-03-12 16:05:00] Dave: I accidentally started therapy today 😅
[2026-03-12 16:06:00] Sam Willis: What do you mean?!?
[2026-03-12 16:07:00] Dave: I was just sitting there at work, fucking off, and some lady came up and motioned to take my AirPods out. So I was like ugh.. wtf bro.. What’s the bitch selling..
[2026-03-12 16:07:00] Dave: Turns out, she was selling mother fucking therapy!
[2026-03-12 16:09:00] Dave: Evidently Schwab has an on-site therapist. She’s at Southlake every Thursday and she was walking around just letting people know because she doesn’t have that many patients there.
[2026-03-12 16:10:00] Dave: So I asked her about availability and she joking said “I could probably get you in today”.. So I was like, fuck it. Let’s do it.
[2026-03-12 16:10:00] Dave: And then I did it.
[2026-03-12 16:10:00] Sam Willis: YASSSSS!!!
[2026-03-12 16:10:00] Sam Willis: tell me EVERYTHING
[2026-03-12 16:11:00] Dave: Can you listen to vm?
[2026-03-12 16:11:00] Sam Willis: Did you tell her you were having an affair with another Schwabbie?? Oh I can’t wait till you get to that part 😂😂 kidding
[2026-03-12 16:12:00] Sam Willis: And the fact you’re just now telling me about this. Omg Is she hott?!? 😒
[2026-03-12 16:12:00] Dave: LMAO
[2026-03-12 16:13:00] Sam Willis: It’s funny that I actually can get jealous when it’s someone I actually sexually desire lol 🤦‍♀️
[2026-03-12 16:14:00] Dave: Remember that whole thing about how well I know you??!!? I knew you needed to talk first 😉
[2026-03-12 16:14:00] Dave: She was probably hot 30 years ago
[2026-03-12 16:23:00] Dave: Audio Message.caf Transcription: The first thing you asked God, so it was all very candid So like I said she came around and she's real nice. We're engaging seems like super real. She said she's been a therapist for 30 years and. She said asked her just a couple basic questions and like I hadn't really even thought about going to therapy but we've been talking about it and you're having these bad couple days and I was like I think I might've even had been reading like a message from you or something at the time or thinking about you or something And I was like, yeah, you know what fuck it I probably could use Just like right then that second and I told her real quick I was like yeah I've done it before but I didn't really know what to talk about and it didn't really work out because of that I was just knew that I was like depressed right and we've talked about all of this Now I do know what's bothering me so yeah let's let's do this and she was like. How's the 11 o'clock fuck yeah let's do it so I guess Schwab gives you a like eight free sessions. This lady does. 45 minute sessions like schedules 45 minutes but will frequently like we went like an hour and 10 minutes a day so she said she'll go however long you know just depending on how much time we both have and if she has like she's on a pathway or something So went and started session and she said I think she asked me What I what I want to talk about and I was like well I don't like my family or my life is like all right. Well, let's get started. I said all right so I kind of just gave her a quick rundown so most of today obviously was just kind of building report which didn't take much. I was basically me just fucking on a whim opening up everything. So I just gave her the whole over and down kind of that I gave you A while ago What kind of the backstory that I never would have kids never want to get married all those things and that I'm now later in life of 27 years later and resentful of all this And we worked through all of that like over the course of 45 minutes Kind of those points doesn't inflection points like getting married against my will so to speak and maybe kids and blah blah blah blah And she asked me a question I wasn't. I wasn't gonna say anything about waves arms around and she asked me a question something like have you ever told anyone this or does anyone else know this and I was like one person does but I'm going to Save that for later and she kind of gave me a look and I was like you you know exactly what this is don't you and she was like yeah and I said all right. I fell in love with a coworker and then. OK for that story So so, yeah, that's where we're at No like major advice really today or nothing We just chatted about stuff she did tell me So she was actually like really kind of I don't wanna say blown away, but I don't know if impressed is the right work but like I gave her so much information that people usually take 345 sessions to get to even start getting into but I was just like ready to fucking unload like I'm on the Goodreads site or something like a whole book Paragraph So like, yeah, she was impressed with that and She essentially said if I guess the advice that she did today was If you do decide to leave Never ever ever Tell your wife that you Our fuck what's the word like like what you just told me never tell her that she was her that you were fuck I just used it again That I held her at like Fuck, you know you know when you feel like My God, how can I not even think of this word? Resentful resentful never ever ever tell her that you feel resemble because that it would be hard enough as is, but that would would ruin her cause you know I don't wanna like do that right So yeah, so that's that's where we're at
[2026-03-12 16:24:00] Dave: I’m gonna list a couple more points as they’re coming back to me:
[2026-03-12 16:28:00] Dave: Told her: *Never wanted to get married or have kids *Don’t really like Juliet anymore (but don’t hold ill will - which is why she said the thing about never telling her - it would just make it all worse) *Don’t like the kids or want to be a parent *Feel resentful for that happening *Met you 4 years ago, were attracted but put it aside, became friends, realized just HOW aligned we are on things, had crazy night, confirmed the 4 years, etc.
[2026-03-12 16:32:00] Sam Willis: Omg! You DID talk about us!! Ah starting to listen now.
[2026-03-12 16:32:00] Dave: Haha, yeah.. I figured I might as well
[2026-03-12 16:36:00] Sam Willis: YOU EVEN SAID A “CO WORKER”?!?! OMG
[2026-03-12 16:36:00] Sam Willis: OK still listening
[2026-03-12 16:36:00] Sam Willis: This. Is. TEA!!!🫖
[2026-03-12 16:37:00] Sam Willis: You know she was eating this shit up.
[2026-03-12 16:37:00] Sam Willis: That’s probably what she was thinking lol
[2026-03-12 16:37:00] Sam Willis: Ok still listening
[2026-03-12 16:40:00] Sam Willis: And to think I was 💯 % joking when I typed this
[2026-03-12 16:40:00] Sam Willis: 🤯🤯
[2026-03-12 16:40:00] Dave: ….go on
[2026-03-12 16:40:00] Sam Willis: And to think I was 💯 % joking when I typed this
[2026-03-12 16:41:00] Dave: Lol
[2026-03-12 16:42:00] Sam Willis: Ok 1. I am proud of/happy for you to talk to someone else about all the things. I think that is wise. 2. Still can’t believe you said it was with a coworker. My my my. 🤦‍♀️ lol did she ask any follow up questions about said coworker? lol 3. Are you going to talk to her again? 4. How did you feel afterwards?
[2026-03-12 16:43:00] Sam Willis: 5. And yes, you are definitely impressive at how self aware YOU are and how well you can articulate your thoughts and feelings.
[2026-03-12 16:50:00] Dave: 1. Thanks baby ❤️ 2. I was totally going to hold on to that part until next time. But it was really the perfect opening. 3. Yeah, I like her… Obviously she’s good at making people feel comfortable lol. 4. I felt good. It felt good to talk about marriage and kids honestly. And it felt good to tell somebody how I feel about you. That’s something I didn’t think I needed but telling someone (besides you) how great you are… Idk.. I like it. 5. This is one of the things I told her about us - how open, expressive, and vulnerable we are.
[2026-03-12 16:51:00] Dave: I end she genuinely didn’t see me as another fuck-face-cheater.
[2026-03-12 16:51:00] Sam Willis: You said i was great? 🥹
[2026-03-12 16:51:00] Dave: Uhh.. ofc
[2026-03-12 16:51:00] Dave: Just a regular cheater
[2026-03-12 16:51:00] Sam Willis: LOLOL
[2026-03-12 16:51:00] Sam Willis: 😭 ❤️
[2026-03-12 16:51:00] Sam Willis: LOLOL
[2026-03-12 16:51:00] Dave: Uhh.. ofc
[2026-03-12 16:53:00] Sam Willis: I love you. And I really do agree that you needed to talk about all this stuff with someone other than me. That’s totally healthy. And it’s a lot to carry!!
[2026-03-12 16:53:00] Dave: Idk.. I think she was surprised how honest and up front we are. And that neither of us hated, and both have compassion for our partners even if they’re not the right ones.
[2026-03-12 16:53:00] Dave: I love you
[2026-03-12 16:54:00] Sam Willis: So. Have you thought about, or did she ask, what you’re hoping to “get” out of talking to her?
[2026-03-12 16:55:00] Sam Willis: For me: I need to get back into therapy bc it took me years OF therapy to become self aware and know my patterns. But I can’t seem to get past that. I can’t seem to take that awareness and make changes that need to happen. It’s like hitting a plateau at the gym. Can you hit a plateau in personal development? Bc I’m there lol
[2026-03-12 16:58:00] Dave: Yeah you absolutely can! Oh shit! That just reminded me!! Now what you know what CBT actually means (not cognitive behavioral therapy), you can see why I’ve always giggled whenever I’ve seen that lolol
[2026-03-12 16:59:00] Dave: That, and Computer Based Training
[2026-03-12 16:59:00] Sam Willis: Cognitive behavioral therapy will always be my first thought. Hopefully lol
[2026-03-12 17:00:00] Dave: Yeah, she asked me what I wanted to get. I told her I didn’t really know. I don’t have an active thing like depression, or anxiety to “fix”. So maybe just to talk about things I can’t talk to anyone else about for the relief or outside perspective.
[2026-03-12 17:06:00] Dave: You should see if Phoenix has an onsite therapist. I bet they do
[2026-03-12 17:06:00] Sam Willis: They did message about one awhile back. I’ll have to go back and look. I am pretty sure she’s at the Peak though which is the office like 25 minutes away sooooo whomp whomp
[2026-03-12 17:07:00] Dave: Damn
[2026-03-12 17:07:00] Dave: What is the latest on the car situation?
[2026-03-12 17:09:00] Sam Willis: Last time I met with my therapist, she was telling me to go into EFT (emotionally focused therapy) and sent me a link of possible therapists. I need to look into it though because I’m not familiar with it.
[2026-03-12 17:11:00] Sam Willis: It’s in the shop still getting fixed. He ended up getting a couple types of financing and is going to be out the $13k or whatever the hell it is. 🤷‍♀️ but that’s another thing that is making me feel bad. How can I end things and expect him to find a new place to live, when it seems he has like no savings.
[2026-03-12 17:11:00] Dave: EFT (Emotionally Focused Therapy) is a short-term, evidence-based psychotherapy that treats emotions as core to healing — not problems to eliminate, but signals that guide transformation. It's rooted in attachment theory and helps people identify and shift negative emotional patterns in themselves and their relationships.
[2026-03-12 17:11:00] Sam Willis: It’s in the shop still getting fixed. He ended up getting a couple types of financing and is going to be out the $13k or whatever the hell it is. 🤷‍♀️ but that’s another thing that is making me feel bad. How can I end things and expect him to find a new place to live, when it seems he has like no savings.
[2026-03-12 17:12:00] Sam Willis: Yea but I need to see what ppl who have actually taken it think. But I do like the fact it’s focused on emotions bc we know your girl has a LOT of those! 😜
[2026-03-12 17:12:00] Sam Willis: Yea but I need to see what ppl who have actually taken it think. But I do like the fact it’s focused on emotions bc we know your girl has a LOT of those! 😜
[2026-03-12 17:12:00] Sam Willis: On the surface though, it sounds like it would be good for me.
[2026-03-12 17:14:00] Dave: You’ve talked about an open relationship as somewhat of a solution. I don’t think super seriously but what if… Instead of that, or kicking him out all together, you break off the “relationship” part and just stay housemates? Move him into the another room that can also be his office…
[2026-03-12 17:14:00] Dave: You’ve talked about an open relationship as somewhat of a solution. I don’t think super seriously but what if… Instead of that, or kicking him out all together, you break off the “relationship” part and just stay housemates? Move him into the another room that can also be his office…
[2026-03-12 17:15:00] Dave: Then you could stop sharing your fucking location 😒
[2026-03-12 17:18:00] Sam Willis: Yea I wouldn’t be like “you need to be end of the week”, but I WOULD want him to be gone within a couple months
[2026-03-12 17:19:00] Sam Willis: I’ve thought about this but the fact is, his anger (in general) doesn’t make me feel safe.
[2026-03-12 17:19:00] Sam Willis: And I worry it will only be worse once we aren’t actually together
[2026-03-12 17:19:00] Dave: That’s actually what I was just gonna say… It would still be an angry environment
[2026-03-12 17:19:00] Sam Willis: 💯
[2026-03-12 17:20:00] Dave: <no text>
[2026-03-12 17:20:00] Dave: Or that
[2026-03-12 17:20:00] Dave:
[2026-03-12 17:20:00] Sam Willis: And what about the kids? They still going to be here 50% of the time, when we are not together? That part is awkward
[2026-03-12 17:20:00] Dave: They can stay with their mother till he figures it out?
[2026-03-12 17:20:00] Dave: Or that
[2026-03-12 17:20:00] Dave: They can stay with their mother till he figures it out?
[2026-03-12 17:21:00] Sam Willis: Yea, the anger part worries me. Not that I think he would ever physically hurt me. But still. And I recognize that this sounds ridiculous, but I get even yelling at my animals. It just won’t be good. For any of us. He’s so unregulated.
[2026-03-12 17:22:00] Dave: First of all, that isn’t ridiculous at all.
[2026-03-12 17:23:00] Dave: Ughh.. you just never know with angry people
[2026-03-12 17:23:00] Sam Willis: I don’t know how to be away from the house for 10 hrs with the dogs alone 😭
[2026-03-12 17:23:00] Dave: Put them in kennels. Or don’t even. They can be around inside. They have access to outside. Or take them to daycare. That’s a non-issue.
[2026-03-12 17:24:00] Dave: There are solutions
[2026-03-12 17:24:00] Dave: Pay some kid to come hang out with them for a while
[2026-03-12 17:24:00] Dave: Or a professional for that matter
[2026-03-12 17:24:00] Dave: Are you ready for solutions yet lol…
[2026-03-12 17:24:00] Dave: Cuz apparently they’re commin
[2026-03-12 17:25:00] Sam Willis: Pre covid, I took them to daycare I think Tuesdays and Thursdays and had Joe day to let them out (this was when they were crated). The only one I crate now though is Lexi. I could leave her out. She’s a fucking shit though. Into everything. But yea, you’re right, that part is all figure out-able.
[2026-03-12 17:26:00] Sam Willis: How the fuck has he been living here essentially free though for 3.5 yrs and not have money saved up?? Like I’m hopeful there actually IS money somewhere that he just doesn’t want to tap into? I dunno. And yes, I DO know that that is not my problem. But of course, it is a huge thing holding me back.
[2026-03-12 17:27:00] Dave: For sure, for sure.
[2026-03-12 17:27:00] Sam Willis: And what if he wants to KEEP one of the dogs?!?!
[2026-03-12 17:27:00] Dave: Lmao
[2026-03-12 17:27:00] Sam Willis: I will lose it
[2026-03-12 17:27:00] Dave: Is that even a question?
[2026-03-12 17:27:00] Sam Willis: I don’t think he would though. And I will NEVER let him.
[2026-03-12 17:28:00] Dave: Yeah what does he spend money on if not mf-ing rent lol
[2026-03-12 17:29:00] Sam Willis: I literally don’t know.
[2026-03-12 17:29:00] Sam Willis: More than anything, I just don’t want to see him be sad or stressed. Bc knowing that I’m the cause of it, and then me having to physically see him go through it, makes me cave and give in, instead of stand firm
[2026-03-12 17:29:00] Sam Willis: I literally don’t know.
[2026-03-12 17:29:00] Dave: Yeah that’s tough for sure
[2026-03-12 17:30:00] Sam Willis: I did this somehow with Joe though. I think it was easier then though because we worked opposite schedules. He was nights. I was days.
[2026-03-12 17:30:00] Sam Willis: He moved into one of the other bedrooms, and then moved out a month and a half later.
[2026-03-12 17:31:00] Sam Willis: But then we tried to co parent the dogs for a couple months and that was a fucking disaster. Every time I would go to his place with the dogs or to pick them up, he would just cry and cry. I can’t do all that again.
[2026-03-12 17:32:00] Dave: Ugh
[2026-03-12 17:32:00] Sam Willis: Can’t someone just break up with ME?!?!! Jesus!!!!
[2026-03-12 17:32:00] Sam Willis: 😂😂 I realize that sounds ridiculous but fuck!! That would solve a lot of things lol
[2026-03-12 17:33:00] Dave: Maybe if you weren’t so AMAZING
[2026-03-12 17:33:00] Sam Willis: I’m so far from that, but thank you. Ha.
[2026-03-12 17:34:00] Dave: Ultimately it’s a matter of dealing with him crying for a couple weeks/months and be done.. Or be a miserable trapped bird for a couple weeks/months and then…. Continue being a miserable trapped bird.
[2026-03-12 17:35:00] Sam Willis: <no text>
[2026-03-12 17:35:00] Dave: Right?!
[2026-03-12 17:36:00] Dave: That’s long ass time of TBL
[2026-03-12 17:36:00] Sam Willis: We are supposed to go somewhere in June, July, and November. And that’s just so far.
[2026-03-12 17:37:00] Sam Willis: TBL = trapped bird living? lol
[2026-03-12 17:37:00] Dave: YES!!!
[2026-03-12 17:37:00] Dave: I knew you’d get it
[2026-03-12 17:37:00] Sam Willis: Omg you and your acronyms. Lolol
[2026-03-12 17:37:00] Dave: Trapped Bird Life… but I’ll take “living”
[2026-03-12 17:38:00] Dave: Right?..
[2026-03-12 17:38:00] Sam Willis: Oh I like Life more though. It flows better. lol
[2026-03-12 17:38:00] Dave: Right?..
[2026-03-12 17:38:00] Dave: Where are you going all those times?
[2026-03-12 17:39:00] Sam Willis: Seattle in mid-June (for his bday and to meet one of his friends…😬😬), my parents in July for my bday, and Mexico in November
[2026-03-12 17:40:00] Sam Willis: And I’m going home atleast one other time for my 20 year (disgusting) high school reunion and like I don’t want him to go. Lolol I’m awful
[2026-03-12 17:40:00] Dave: You’re not awfulllll
[2026-03-12 17:41:00] Sam Willis: Just “awful”?
[2026-03-12 17:41:00] Dave: Lol
[2026-03-12 17:41:00] Dave: Awfully pretty maybe
[2026-03-12 17:41:00] Dave: I mean.. definitely
[2026-03-12 17:42:00] Dave: So yeah.. that’s an awful lot of TBL.
[2026-03-12 17:43:00] Dave: Not to mention all your self-torture for being “awful” when you’re really just with someone you don’t want to be with.
[2026-03-12 17:44:00] Dave: So it’s just that easy. Stop being a pussy.
[2026-03-12 17:44:00] Dave: 🤪Kidding!! Ofc
[2026-03-12 17:45:00] Sam Willis: <no text>
[2026-03-12 17:45:00] Dave: Hehehe
[2026-03-12 17:57:00] Sam Willis: Welp 🤷‍♀️😅🥵
[2026-03-12 17:57:00] Sam Willis: <no text>
[2026-03-12 17:58:00] Sam Willis: <no text>
[2026-03-12 17:59:00] Sam Willis: <no text>
[2026-03-12 18:02:00] Dave: Shut up!!
[2026-03-12 18:02:00] Dave: Shut up!!
[2026-03-12 18:03:00] Dave: YESSSS! Omg I so wasnt expecting all this sexiness 🥵
[2026-03-12 18:03:00] Dave: YESSSS! Omg I so wasnt expecting all this sexiness 🥵
[2026-03-12 18:03:00] Dave: Ahhhh you are so sexy 🔥
[2026-03-12 18:04:00] Sam Willis: Just thinking/dreaming about you ❤️
[2026-03-12 18:04:00] Dave: Mmmmm, I love you 💗
[2026-03-12 18:06:00] Dave: Are you coming CUMing out of the funk you think?
[2026-03-12 18:07:00] Sam Willis: I love you too baby.
[2026-03-12 18:08:00] Sam Willis: I’m getting there. Veryyyyy slowly. Still feeling a lot of ways. Mostly dread lol
[2026-03-12 18:08:00] Sam Willis: But…small joys.
[2026-03-12 18:08:00] Sam Willis: Like CUMing to you 🥵😜
[2026-03-12 20:22:00] Sam Willis: Logging into Schwab.com from an email I got about one of my equity awards. But this looks sketch AF.
[2026-03-12 20:23:00] Dave: Did you click the link in the email!
[2026-03-12 20:23:00] Dave: !
[2026-03-12 20:23:00] Dave: ?
[2026-03-12 20:23:00] Sam Willis: It’s real bc I went directly to the site afterwards to log in
[2026-03-12 20:23:00] Sam Willis: And yes. I clicked the link
[2026-03-12 20:23:00] Sam Willis: IT’S FINE
[2026-03-12 20:24:00] Dave: Unless it stole your pw and then forwarded you to the site
[2026-03-12 20:24:00] Dave: Never click on the link directly. Go to the site and navigate to it. That way you know exactly what’s happening
[2026-03-12 20:25:00] Sam Willis: I knowwwwww. Hmph. Even though yes, I did click the link this time. IT’S FINE lol
[2026-03-12 20:25:00] Sam Willis: It’s all legit. It’s just the text sounds….suspect
[2026-03-12 20:25:00] Sam Willis: I knowwwwww. Hmph. Even though yes, I did click the link this time. IT’S FINE lol
[2026-03-12 20:27:00] Dave: Thank you for contacting your WAA service center. If theres anything else I can do for you, don’t hesitate to contact me. Have a great evening.
[2026-03-12 20:28:00] Sam Willis: Where is the little survey so I can leave feedback on your customer service?
[2026-03-12 20:29:00] Dave: I’ll get that sent right out ma’am, I’ll just need your social security number, and dob first please.
[2026-03-12 20:32:00] Sam Willis: *Report smishing*
[2026-03-12 20:34:00] Dave: Thank you for reporting potential fraud! A member of our team will contact you shortly to get your social security number and dob to complete your request. Have a great evening.
[2026-03-12 20:40:00] Sam Willis: 10/10 do NOT recommend the WAA service center. My service rep was bossy, argumentative, and overall, a little sus.
[2026-03-12 21:14:00] Dave: Dear Karen, The WWASC values your feedback. Your complaint has been escalated to the hurt feels department. A representative will be with you shortly to verify your identity to ensure this matter is handled in a timely manner. Please have your social security number and dob ready.
[2026-03-12 21:15:00] Sam Willis: LOL
[2026-03-12 21:15:00] Sam Willis: WWASC, I’m reporting your ass to the BBB
[2026-03-12 21:15:00] Sam Willis: 🖕🏻
[2026-03-12 21:16:00] Dave: Hahaha
[2026-03-12 21:17:00] Sam Willis: <no text>
[2026-03-12 21:18:00] Sam Willis: Also. It’s WAASC. Not WWASC. Geesh. ❤️, Karen
[2026-03-12 21:18:00] Dave: Damnit
[2026-03-12 21:19:00] Sam Willis: Also
[2026-03-12 21:19:00] Sam Willis: <no text>
[2026-03-12 21:19:00] Dave: Hmmm
[2026-03-12 21:19:00] Dave: Personality trait…
[2026-03-12 21:20:00] Sam Willis: This seems timely bc I think mine, for you, is your quick wit and banter. Because making me laugh is 💯 a great way to get me naked 😉 and I feel like we get each others humor.
[2026-03-12 21:20:00] Sam Willis: But it’s a toss up between that or your ability to know exactly what to say to me when I’m in a mood.
[2026-03-12 21:21:00] Dave: Damn, you nailed those!
[2026-03-12 21:23:00] Dave: I think mine would be along the same line as humor/wit - but specifically like, how playful you are, which also goes along with how we get each other’s humor. Even through text its always spot on.
[2026-03-12 21:23:00] Dave: Also your emotional and general intelligence
[2026-03-12 21:24:00] Sam Willis: I love that. And you. ❤️
[2026-03-12 21:24:00] Dave: I love YOU, babydoll
[2026-03-12 21:25:00] Sam Willis: Life is too short to be around ppl that don’t make you laugh. 😩
[2026-03-12 21:27:00] Dave: Yeah that’s thing #2938948 I love about you. You frequently make me laugh. You’re very funny when you want to be.
[2026-03-12 21:28:00] Sam Willis: So are you! And I also love love that I have met my MATCH in the dramatics department! 😂😂
[2026-03-12 21:28:00] Dave: Lmao
[2026-03-12 21:29:00] Dave: I ate a cheezit today and almost defenestrated the whole fucking bag
[2026-03-12 21:31:00] Sam Willis: Because they were gross?
[2026-03-12 21:31:00] Dave: Yes!
[2026-03-12 21:32:00] Sam Willis: The normal size ones too?
[2026-03-12 21:32:00] Dave: Wasn’t that the whole “drama” thing?
[2026-03-12 21:32:00] Dave: No, I haven’t tired the regular ones yet
[2026-03-12 21:33:00] Sam Willis: One of the MILLION times you’ve acted dramatic 😂
[2026-03-12 21:33:00] Sam Willis: Will get on ittttt!! You know the big ones suck now.
[2026-03-12 21:33:00] Sam Willis: One of the MILLION times you’ve acted dramatic 😂
[2026-03-12 21:33:00] Sam Willis: Will get on ittttt!! You know the big ones suck now.
[2026-03-12 21:33:00] Dave: <no text>
[2026-03-12 21:34:00] Sam Willis: <no text>
[2026-03-12 21:34:00] Sam Willis:
[2026-03-12 21:47:00] Sam Willis: How has your evening been?
[2026-03-12 21:55:00] Dave: My evening has been great ever since this 🥵
[2026-03-12 21:55:00] Dave: My evening has been great ever since this 🥵
[2026-03-12 21:55:00] Dave: Hbu?
[2026-03-12 22:05:00] Sam Willis: I’m good. Headache but it’s probably bc I’ve been working the past couple hours 🙄
[2026-03-12 22:08:00] Dave: ♥️ for the “I’m good”… not the headache or work 😜
[2026-03-12 22:09:00] Dave: Well, I’m laying here in bed with Bear.
[2026-03-12 22:10:00] Dave: Probably going to crash out soon
[2026-03-12 22:10:00] Sam Willis: Give him a kiss from me!!
[2026-03-12 22:10:00] Sam Willis: I’ll probably go to bed soon ish myself.
[2026-03-12 22:10:00] Sam Willis: Thanks for putting up with me today. You’re the absolute best ❤️
[2026-03-12 22:10:00] Dave: Goodnight my love. I hope you have a better day tomorrow.
[2026-03-12 22:11:00] Sam Willis: Good night baby. Hope you sleep well!
[2026-03-12 22:11:00] Dave: lol… the pleasure is all mine, as always
[2026-03-12 22:11:00] Dave: I love you, sweet pea
[2026-03-12 22:12:00] Sam Willis: I love you

DAY OVERVIEW Thursday: A challenging morning transitions into a therapeutic midday and ends with playful banter. The most defining moment involves Dave's unexpected therapy session, which catalyzes reflection and honest communication about their relationship and individual struggles.

TOPIC INVENTORY 1. Therapy and Self-Awareness - Dave unexpectedly starts therapy, sharing his background and feelings about marriage and relationships. He feels good about discussing his emotions, especially about Sam. - Emotional register: Vulnerable, relieved. - "I felt good. It felt good to talk about marriage and kids honestly."

  1. Sam's Emotional State
  2. Sam struggles with feelings of unhappiness and worthlessness, reflecting on her life choices and current relationship.
  3. Emotional register: Sad, frustrated.

  4. "I’m just fucking sad."

  5. Relationship with Christian

  6. Sam discusses feeling trapped and overwhelmed, considering the implications of ending her relationship with Christian.
  7. Emotional register: Overwhelmed, anxious.

  8. "I don’t know how to be away from the house for 10 hrs with the dogs alone."

  9. WAA and Their Relationship

  10. They discuss the nature and impact of their relationship, balancing joy with sadness and the "forbidden" nature.
  11. Emotional register: Conflicted, loving.

  12. "WAA adds a layer of stress and sadness (as well as joy and happiness)."

  13. Future Plans and Challenges

  14. They talk about various trips planned with Christian, which complicate Sam's feelings about ending the relationship.
  15. Emotional register: Anxious, conflicted.

  16. "We are supposed to go somewhere in June, July, and November."

  17. Humor and Banter

  18. Light-hearted exchanges about personality traits, customer service jokes, and dramatics.
  19. Emotional register: Playful, humorous.
  20. "10/10 do NOT recommend the WAA service center. My service rep was bossy, argumentative, and overall, a little sus."

SEXUAL & PHYSICAL CONTENT - Sexual fantasies and longing are expressed, with playful teasing about being with each other and physical sensations mentioned. - Initiated by Sam with teasing about getting naked due to laughter and longing for Dave. - Specific language: "Thinking/dreaming about you," "CUMing to you."

EMOTIONAL DYNAMICS - Dave leads with emotional support, encouraging Sam to express her feelings. Sam is vulnerable about her emotional struggles. - Expressions of love and longing are frequent, with Dave reassuring Sam of her worth. - Power dynamics: Dave reassures Sam without trying to fix her problems, maintaining a supportive role.

MEMORABLE LANGUAGE - "I’m not justifying it though. I am truly sick of myself and don’t want to be a drain on you." — Sam - "I love YOU, babydoll." — Dave - "Life is too short to be around ppl that don’t make you laugh." — Sam - "I think she was surprised how honest and up front we are." — Dave - "I love that. And you." — Sam - "Awfully pretty maybe." — Dave

CONTINUITY HOOKS - Sam's search for a therapist and potential therapy modalities like EFT. - The unresolved tension about ending her relationship with Christian. - Upcoming trips and how they will impact her decision-making. - Dave's continued engagement with therapy and how it influences his relationship with Sam.

MOOD MAP Vulnerable confession → therapeutic reflection → playful teasing → emotional reassurance → loving banter

Thursday started with a heaviness I couldn’t quite shake off, like trying to run in a dream. I woke up feeling the familiar pull of unhappiness, the kind that settles in the pit of your stomach and refuses to budge. As I went through the motions of the morning, I felt trapped in my own choices, questioning everything—from my relationship with Christian to every step that brought me here. "I’m just fucking sad," I whispered to myself, an admission more than a complaint.

Then came the unexpected shift at midday. Dave called and mentioned he’d started therapy. I didn’t see it coming, yet it felt like a necessary chapter in our story. He talked about the session, his feelings about marriage and relationships, and there was something in his voice—vulnerability, maybe relief. It was like he was opening a door to a room I didn’t know existed, even after all these years. "I felt good," he said. "It felt good to talk about marriage and kids honestly." I listened, heart swelling with both pride and hope for him. And in that moment, I felt closer to him, knowing he was inviting me into this new part of his journey.

The afternoon turned reflective, Dave urging me to share my own emotional mess. I felt exposed, revealing how worthless I’d been feeling lately. "I’m not justifying it though," I said, the words tumbling out. "I am truly sick of myself and don’t want to be a drain on you." But there was Dave, steady and reassuring, always knowing how to lift the weight without trying to fix it. He reminded me of my worth in ways that made me feel seen, even when the mirror showed a stranger.

We wandered into lighter territory next, letting humor soften the day’s edges. It’s one of those things with us; we always find our way back to laughter. We joked about the ridiculousness of it all, like the WAA service center. "10/10 do NOT recommend the WAA service center," I laughed. "My service rep was bossy, argumentative, and overall, a little sus." Dave chuckled, and his laughter felt like sunlight after rain.

As the day wound down, we found ourselves in familiar territory, talking about future plans. The trips on the horizon with Christian loomed large, complicating my already tangled emotions. Anxiety whispered in my ear, reminding me of the inevitable decisions ahead. But then Dave’s voice brought me back, grounding me with a simple, "Life is too short to be around ppl that don’t make you laugh." It was a statement and a question wrapped in one, challenging me to choose happiness.

The evening was sweetened with playful teasing, a gentle reprieve from the earlier weight. I found myself wrapped in thoughts of him, longing and laughter intermingling as I teased about getting naked, the laughter bubbling over into desire. "I love YOU, babydoll," he said, and it was all the reassurance I needed. We closed the day with loving banter, his words echoing in my mind: "I think she was surprised how honest and up front we are." That honesty, our rawness with each other, is the lifeblood of what we have.

I ended the day with a quiet sense of gratitude, knowing that whatever lies ahead, we’ll face it together. "Awfully pretty maybe," he had said, a smile in his voice. And in that moment, I believed him.

Today began with an unexpected twist—I'd decided to start therapy. This wasn't planned, but it was something I’d been mulling over for a while. The session was surprisingly cathartic. I found myself talking about marriage and relationships, and, of course, Sam. Saying those thoughts out loud, thoughts I’d turned over quietly in my own head, felt strangely liberating. The therapist seemed a bit taken aback by my openness, but that’s how it’s always been with Sam and me—no pretenses, just honesty. I walked out feeling lighter, like I’d unloaded a weight I didn’t even realize I was carrying.

Later, when I spoke to Sam, it was clear she was struggling. She shared her feelings of unhappiness and worthlessness, and I could hear the frustration in her voice. It broke my heart a little. I want to fix things for her, to make it all better, but I know that's not my role. Instead, I just listened. When she talked about feeling trapped in her relationship with Christian and how overwhelming it all is, I could sense the anxiety woven through her words. She mentioned how daunting it is to be away from the house for hours with the dogs, and I knew this was about more than logistics.

We delved into the complicated web of our relationship, the joy and sadness it brings in equal measure. WAA—that's what we call it—adds a layer of stress, but it's also the source of so much happiness. We talked about upcoming trips with Christian, how they complicate everything, and I saw the conflict on her face. There's a part of me that wants to tell her to leave, to come to me, but I know she has to find her own way through this.

Amidst the heaviness, we managed to find pockets of laughter. Our banter is an old, comforting dance. I joked about the WAA service center, about her being bossy and a little 'sus'—she laughed, and that sound was like music to me. She teased me, saying life is too short for people who don’t make you laugh, and I couldn’t agree more.

We slipped into familiar exchanges about fantasies and longing. Sam's teasing about getting naked and thinking about me was like a spark that reignited the warmth between us. It’s one of those things that’s always been easy with us, the way we can effortlessly shift from serious conversations to playful flirtation.

Her vulnerability is something I cherish. She told me she felt like a drain, and all I wanted was to pull her close and reassure her of her worth. I love her, plain and simple. And when I told her that, her soft response, "I love that. And you," wrapped around me like a tender embrace.

The day was a whirlwind of emotions, but as I sat there, reflecting on everything, I realized how grateful I am for this connection we share. It's profoundly real, built on a foundation of complete honesty and trust. As the day wound down, I felt a deep sense of peace knowing that whatever comes next, we will face it together.

The neon sign flickered above the motel, casting a dim red glow across the parking lot pavement. Dave's rental car idled in front of room seven, engine still running, exhaust curling in the cool night air.

Inside, the forty-watt bulb glowed yellow through cheap curtains. The room smelled like stale cigarettes and lemon-scented air freshener, a futile attempt at freshness in a space designed for impermanence. Single bed, small table, bathroom door slightly ajar. Generic landscape print on the wall - mountains where they weren't.

Sam stood by the window, back to the door, shoulders dropped from tension. She'd driven seven hours straight after their call, the conversation playing through her head on repeat. The laughter. The honesty. His voice, solid and grounding, when everything else felt like it was crumbling.

She didn't turn when she heard the door open. Didn't need to. Knowing Dave was there - that specific presence that made the air in any room heavier, warmer - was enough.

"You came." Her voice came out quiet, rough.

Three steps. Four. He stood behind her, close enough that she could feel his body heat but not quite touching. "Always."

She turned then, looked up at him - really looked. Dark circles under her eyes, hair pulled back messy from driving with the window down, the slight tremble in her bottom lip she always got when she was about to cry or about to unravel, sometimes both.

"What's happening to us?" Not a rejection. Not a plea. The way she'd asked questions when they first started working together - information gathering, facts before feeling. "I'm thirty-six, Dave. I feel like I'm losing everything I thought I'd built and it's never coming back."

His hands found her waist, thumbs brushing the soft skin just above her hips. "You're not losing it, Sam. You're just realizing what was never there to begin with."

She let out a sound - half laugh, half sob - and it broke something loose in him. His mouth found hers, hungry but careful, tasting salt and desperation. Her nails scraped down his back through his shirt, demanding pressure, demanding presence.

"Bedroom's that way." She breathed against his mouth, already pulling him toward the narrow space.

He shoved the door open with his shoulder, backing her toward the unmade bed. The room was too bright, too exposed, but she didn't care. When they hit the mattress, she locked her legs around him, pulling him flush, grinding herself against the hardness that never took long with Dave.

"We can't keep doing this," she said, but her fingers were already working at his belt buckle.

"I know." His voice rough, distracted. "Fuck, you feel amazing."

She laughed, a genuine burst of sound that came from someplace deep. "Life is too short to be around people that don't make you laugh, right?"

"Ten/ten do NOT recommend the WAA service center." He quoted back at her, the way she'd thrown the acronym around like a shield. "My service rep was bossy, argumentative, and overall a little sus."

Her laugh turned into a gasp as he slipped a hand between them, finding her through her jeans already damp. "How are you so good at this?"

"Comes naturally," he murmured, working the button free, unzipping, slipping fingers under the waistband of her underwear. "Haven't you noticed?"

The conversation traced back through her mind - therapy, his unexpected session, her own breakup looming, the trips scheduled with Christian she couldn't bring herself to cancel. All of it was there in the frantic way she scrambled out of her clothes, in the way he caught her wrists when she tried to reach for his zipper too fast.

"Slow down." His grip was firm but not painful. "Let me look at you first."

She flushed, suddenly shy in the harsh motel light where everything showed. Every scar. Every freckle she hated. Every line age was starting to carve into the perfect smooth canvas she'd maintained for so long.

"Why?" She hated the vulnerability in her voice.

"Because I've been dreaming about this for five hundred miles." He guided her back on the bed, palms sliding up her arms, over the light scars on her hips from when she was sixteen and stupid, across her stomach crowded with stretch marks from years she wouldn't call comfortable but were hers nonetheless.

He took in every detail of her in a way that made her want to cover herself, hide, run. But he was looking like he'd just found something beautiful he'd lost years ago. Like she'd given him a gift by letting him see her like this.

"Seven years old the first time I felt this sense of loss," she said out of nowhere, words spilling like confession. "My father was passed out on the couch, my mother was gone to work again, and I remember thinking my whole life should have started differently than this."

He stopped breathing for a second.

"That's when you started becoming the version of yourself that worked best for survival," he finished for her, soft, certain.

Her eyes watered. She blinked hard. "How did you know that?"

"Because I feel like I've known you for seven years." He crawled up her body slowly, deliberate, stopping at every inch. "And I'm not giving you back."

She made a sound that wasn't a word, just need, just permission, and wrapped her legs around his hips when he settled between them, still fully clothed, still in complete control of the pace.

He kissed her then, not the frantic heat of before but something deeper, slower, like he was memorizing her mouth. His tongue traced the seam of her lips, pushed inside when she opened for him. She tasted him back like she was starving.

"Tell me what you need," he murmured against her throat, sucking gently at the pulse point. "Not what you think I need. Not what you think you should need. What you need right now, exactly."

Pressure built beneath her skin like something physical was trying to push out. "I need to feel something that isn't sadness."

He rolled his hips against her, already hard, already ready. "Check."

She tried to take control then, reaching for his belt, his zipper, but his fingers circled her wrists again, this time with enough pressure to remind her who was in charge. "You gave me the okay to touch you, but not to touch myself," she rasped.

"Those aren't the terms." He squeezed just enough to make her gasp. "I'm going to eat you out. You're going to lie there and take it. If you try to touch me while I'm doing it, there will be consequences."

"Consequences." She almost laughed. "That sounds ominous."

"I'm not scared of you," he said bluntly. "You don't get to use sex to control the situation anymore."

Something in her chest loosened, broke, opened.

He tugged down her underwear and left them around one ankle, a restriction she hadn't asked for but made her wetter already. He settled between her legs but higher than she expected, his chest brushing her clit with every breath, making her twitch.

He went slowly, mock-tenuously, testing her patience. She arched, trying to get more pressure, but he pulled back.

"None of that now," he murmured. "You're going to be a good girl and take what I give you."

She flushed all over, nipples pebbling, hands reaching without thinking.

He caught her wrists again, holding them to the bed above her head. "Against the rules."

She hesitated. Struggling with the impulse.

"You look like you're doing calculus in your head. Stop thinking. Just feel."

When he finally moved down, she thought she might actually die from the sensation of his breath against her aching flesh. The first swipe of his tongue made her entire body jerk, and he groaned like her taste was the best thing he'd ever had in his mouth.

"That's the sweetest pussy I've had in months," he informed her conversationally, and she almost laughed again but then he licked up through her folds and the laugh turned into a startled gasp.

He ate her like he loved the taste of her more than air. Not tender. Not gentle. Thorough and purposeful with the occasional bite that made her yelp and his thumbs stroking soothing lines over her hip bones.

She tried to stay still - the rules said she had to - but when he closed his lips around her clit and sucked hard, she bucked against his face anyway. He growled against her, the vibration making her clench.

"Remember the rules," he warned up at her, his voice wrecked. "None of you moves unless I move it first."

She'd never experienced this from a man before - this kind of attentiveness to what she wanted, this actual interest in making the experience about her pleasure versus his. They always wanted it to be quick, she knew, because they were afraid of running over their time limits. Afraid she'd decide halfway through that she'd rather be doing something else. Afraid she'd decide she wasn't worth the effort.

Dave wasn't afraid of any of that. He wasn't keeping track of anything but the way her body was unfolding against his mouth.

She didn't usually come from oral sex - not after years of practice with men who thought a few licks counted. But with him, it snuck up on her. The tension wound tighter than she'd thought possible. Something building in her core that felt completely new and absolutely necessary.

She didn't warn him. Didn't know she was supposed to. When the orgasm hit, it crashed through her like breaking a fever, making her convulse against his grip, making her cry out so loud it was embarrassing.

He held her hips down, fingers digging in just shy of pain, tongue still working through the aftershocks until she was whimpering, pushing at his shoulders, begging him to stop.

He crawled back up her body slowly, mouth slick, eyes dark with satisfaction. "You had no idea how good that feels when someone cares, did you?"

She couldn't speak. Didn't need to.

He kissed her, and she could taste herself on his tongue. He kept kissing her until she was grinding against him again, until she wrapped her legs around him once more and he groaned into her mouth.

"Can I talk dirty?" He asked against her lips, his voice low.

"Yes," she breathed. Pleaded. "Please."

He unzipped, pushed his jeans down just enough, pulled a condom from his wallet with one hand while the other held her gaze. She watched him roll it on with the focused intensity of a man who knows exactly what he's doing, and it made her ache worse.

"I want to fuck you," he said, so matter-of-fact. "I want to fuck you for a very long time, but first I want to make you come again. I want to feel you clamp down on me the way you did when you came on my tongue."

She realized she was breathing too fast. Knew he'd notice, too.

He positioned himself at her entrance, the head rubbing through her slickness, not pushing in. "Look at me. I want to watch your eyes when you come."

He sank into her slowly, and when he was fully seated, she couldn't breathe properly. He filled her in a way sex hadn't in years. His thickness, his length, the way he seemed to know exactly where to angle himself. Like he'd already mapped out the parts of her that would make her cry out.

He started moving, not gentle. "I'm going to make you come twice before I even think about my own pleasure. I think you need that."

She closed her eyes, strained against his grip on her wrists he'd never released.

"Don't look away from me." His voice rough. Warning. Promise. "I want to see when it happens."

He found a rhythm that was almost cruel in its control, pulling out until just the tip remained, then sliding back in until their hips met with a quiet slap of flesh. The drag of his cock against her walls was so intense she thought she might pass out. The sounds they made together - the slick, filthy noises of sex - were everything she hadn't realized she'd been missing.

Three minutes later, she was coming again, this time with her eyes locked on his. Her walls spasmed around him, milked him, and she swore she could feel his cock twitch inside her as she rode through the peak.

"You're so fucking beautiful," he groaned, and she believed him, believed every dirty word he said, believed them because they felt true when he spoke them against her skin.

Afterward, they lay tangled on the narrow bed, both sweaty and spent. He'd cleaned them up before getting up, tossing the condom in the trash can by the nightstand with the casual efficiency of a man who'd done this before many times.

She couldn't stop touching him - his arm, his chest, the back of his hand when he finally lay down beside her. "I don't know what happens next," she admitted finally.

"Then we figure it out tomorrow." He kissed her temple. "Right now rest."

"Where's the bathroom?" She already felt awful for nagging the way she always did about logistics.

"One door down," he said, and she believed him.

The room was still too bright, but she was too exhausted to care anymore. She turned toward him, fitting her body against his side, throwing a leg over his thighs in a gesture that felt more intimate than anything they'd done in the hours before.

"Sleep," he murmured, his fingers stroking up and down her arm. "I've got you."

She closed her eyes and let herself believe it.

The storm outside was a flat, gray wall of particulate oblivion. Inside the sealed module, the air smelled of recycled oxygen, static, and a low, metallic hum of dread. Dave watched the environmental readouts scroll across the main panel, his fingers resting lightly on the console. Pressure holding. Temperature stable. Exterior comms: dead.

Sam leaned against the bulkhead behind him, her shoulder pressed to a vertical pipe, her breathing a quiet, measured counterpoint to the machinery. “No chirp from the deep array for twelve hours,” she said, her voice devoid of the professional panic she was feeling. “That’s not a malfunction. That’s a silence.”

The Antarctic Deep-Scan Array was supposed to sing. It listened, through miles of ice and ancient rock, to the seismic whispers of the planet’s mantle. Its cessation wasn’t a technical problem; it was a metaphysical one. Something had stopped the song. Dave and Sam were the two-person diagnostic team sent to the remote outpost, Aethelred Station, to find out why. They’d arrived yesterday, just before the continent-wide whiteout had sealed them in. Now they were diagnosticians trapped in a silent tomb, waiting for the storm to pass so they could descend into the array’s subterranean vaults.

“We could run the internal diagnostics from here,” Dave said, not looking at her.

“We could,” Sam agreed. Her tone said they wouldn’.t

He turned his head slightly. She was watching the storm through the small reinforced viewport. Her profile was tense, the line of her jaw sharp against the flat light. He saw the weight on her, the same weight she’d carried in her voice during their last comms check, before the static drowned everything. The sadness she’d named, not as a complaint, but as a fact. I’m just fucking sad.

It wasn’t about the array. It was about the life waiting for her back in Tucson, the one she felt trapped in, the one with the planned trips in June, July, November—trips she couldn’t imagine taking now. It was about the forbidden thing between them, four years deep, that made every other attachment feel like a husk. Here, in this sterile, pressurized metal box at the bottom of the world, with the wind screaming outside and the deep array silent below, it was the only thing that wasn’t a lie.

“Come here,” Dave said, his voice not a command, but an inevitability.

She didn’t move for a moment, then she crossed the narrow space of the control room and stood beside his chair. He didn’t touch her. He reached over and tapped a sequence on a secondary panel, bringing up the internal station schematics. “Life support’s independent. We have seventy-two hours of reserve if primary power fails.” He was giving her facts, something to hold onto besides the feeling.

She placed her hand on his shoulder. The contact was electric in the sterile quiet. “I don’t know how to be away from the house for ten hours,” she said softly, quoting her own anxiety but transmuting it, applying it to this new, frozen context. “But being here, with this silence… it’s the same kind of alone.”

He stood then, turning to face her. The control room was tight, consoles and racks leaving only a few feet of clear floor. He cupped her face, his thumbs brushing the high arches of her cheeks. “You’re not alone.”

Her eyes closed. A shudder went through her, not from cold, but from the release of a brace she’d been holding for months. Here, at the literal edge of the habitable world, there was no performance. There was only them, and the hum of the machine keeping them alive, and the screaming white nothing outside.

He kissed her. It wasn’t gentle. It was a claiming, a punctuation in the silence. His mouth was hard and warm against hers, his hands moving from her face to the back of her neck, holding her there. She opened for him instantly, a gasp lost in his mouth, her body melting against the solid plane of his chest. The kiss went deep, past reassurance, into a territory of pure need. When he broke it, her lips were swollen, her breath ragged.

“The diagnostic,” she whispered, her forehead against his chin.

“The diagnostic is that something’s dead down there,” he said, his voice low and final. “Our job is to find out what. But first, my job is you.”

He backed her against the main console, its screens glowing with meaningless data. He undid the closures of her thermal suit, not hurriedly, but with deliberate, unhurried precision. The outer layer fell open. The inner layer, a sleek black bodysuit, followed. He peeled it down her torso, exposing her skin to the cool, recycled air. She trembled, but not from the temperature.

He knelt. He pulled the suit down her legs, removing her boots, until she stood before him in only her briefs, her skin pale and perfect in the instrument light. He rose, his hands skimming up her thighs, over her hips. He hooked his fingers in the waistband of her briefs and drew them down. She let him, her head tilted back against the console edge, her eyes on the ceiling.

“Look at me,” he said.

She did. Her gaze was wide, dark, completely surrendered.

He unsealed his own suit, shedding the bulky thermal layers until he stood in his own undergear. He didn’t remove it. He stepped into her, his body aligning against hers, the hard heat of him pressing against her belly through the fabric. He reached between them and pulled his cock free from his briefs, thick and already urgent.

He didn’t ask. He lifted her, his hands under her thighs, and sat her on the edge of the console. The screens flickered beneath her. He guided himself into her, one slow, inexorable push that filled her utterly. She cried out—a sharp, broken sound that echoed in the metal room. Her hands flew to his shoulders, her fingers digging into the muscle there.

He held her there, impaled, not moving, letting her feel the full, stretching possession. “This is what’s real,” he said against her ear, his voice a gravel vibration. “This. The silence outside doesn’t matter. The dead array doesn’t matter. The life you’re supposed to go back to doesn’t matter. All that matters is that I know you. And you know me. And right now, I’m inside you where nothing else can reach.”

Then he began to move.

His thrusts were deep, measured, powerful. Each drive buried him to the root, each withdrawal almost complete, making her feel the shocking emptiness before the shocking fullness again. The console rocked slightly under their combined weight. Her heels hooked over his hips, her body opened, taken, her mind blanking out into a white noise of sensation that was louder than the storm. She moaned, each exhale a surrender, her nails scoring his skin.

He watched her face, watching every flicker of pleasure, every spike of overwhelm. He controlled the pace, the angle, the depth. He was the steady thing in the chaos, the reason she could stop bracing. He fucked her with a focused intensity that was both technical and profoundly savage. It was a diagnostic of her soul, a probing of her deepest ache, and the solution was him, here, claiming her in the most physical way possible.

Her orgasm built like a seismic event—deep, slow, then suddenly catastrophic. It shook through her, a convulsive wave that locked her around him, her back arching off the console, a choked scream tearing from her throat. He didn’t stop. He rode her through it, his rhythm unbroken, driving her into the oversensitive, shattering aftermath until she was sobbing, her body pliant, utterly spent.

Only then did he let his own control fracture. His thrusts shortened, quickened, turned brutal. He hammered into her, his hands gripping her thighs hard enough to bruise, his head down, his breath a ragged storm in her hair. When he came, it was with a low, guttural groan, his body locking, pumping his release deep into her in hot, pulsing jets. He stayed there, buried, for a long minute, his weight pressing her into the console, his forehead against her collar.

The storm outside had not abated. The array was still silent. The room smelled of sex and sweat and recycled air.

He lifted her off the console, holding her against him as he pulled her briefs back up, then her bodysuit, re-sealing her thermal layers with the same precision he’d used to open them. He dressed himself. They stood again in their full gear, two diagnosticians in a control room, as if nothing had happened.

But everything had.

Sam leaned into him, her head on his chest. “I felt good,” she murmured, quoting him from a thousand miles and a different context. “It felt good to talk honestly.”

He kissed her temple. “Life is too short to be around people who don’t make you laugh,” he said, his voice soft now. “Or who don’t make you feel this.”

She smiled, a small, true thing. “Awfully pretty maybe.”

He straightened, looked at the main panel. The storm’s intensity was decreasing. The whiteout was thinning. In an hour, they could descend.

“Ready?” he asked.

She nodded, her eyes clear, the sadness not gone, but shared now, held between them where it could be borne. “Yeah. Let’s go find the silence.”

They gathered their tools, their probes, their portable scanners. The descent shaft was a vertical tube of ice-metal composite, lit by cold blue LEDs. They climbed down, one after the other, into the deep, silent dark.

The key to his downtown loft was still warm from her palm when Sam stepped over the threshold into the silence. The usual cityscape glittered beyond the floor-to-ceiling windows, but the apartment was dark save for a single lamp glowing in the living area, its light catching the edge of something metallic and unfamiliar on the polished concrete floor. Dave stood by the window, a silhouette against the night, holding two glasses of amber liquid. He didn’t turn immediately, letting the click of the door closing, the sigh of her coat being shrugged off, fill the space between them.

“Ten out of ten do not recommend the service center,” she said softly, repeating the afternoon’s joke, a nervous ribbon of humor in the quiet. “My rep was a no-show. Left me waiting.”

He turned then, a slow, deliberate pivot. The light caught his face, his expression calm, a deep, still pool. “I heard the complaints,” he said, his voice that low Virginia cadence that never hurried. “Made other arrangements.” He crossed the room, handed her a glass. Their fingers brushed. “You sounded tired of yourself today, babydoll. Said you didn’t want to be a drain.”

She took a sip, the whiskey burning a smooth path down. “I meant it.”

“I know you did.” He set his own glass down, untouched. His gaze traveled over her, not assessing, but collecting. “So we’re changing the channel. No more talking about what drains you. Tonight, you don’t have to think. You just have to feel.” He gestured with his chin toward the center of the room. “Go stand by the bench.”

It wasn’t a bench, not really. It was a padded leather contraption, low and wide, with hinged arms and restraints waiting, slack and open. The metal she’d glimpsed was a small, polished cart beside it, laid out with items she recognized and some she didn’t: coils of black rope, a blindfold, a flogger with tails of soft suede, a longer, meaner-looking one of braided leather, several silicone toys in neutral shades, and a thick, intimidating wand vibrator. It was a curated selection. Planned. For her.

Her heart began a steady, heavy drum against her ribs. This was the hidden room, the one he’d alluded to weeks ago when they’d talked about contracts and safewords and the shape of her surrender. They’d negotiated via text, a bizarrely clinical exchange of limits and curiosities that had left her flushed and aching. Seeing it made real was different. It was a promise, and a demand.

“The word,” he prompted, his voice a gentle command from behind her as she approached the bench.

“Red,” she breathed.

“Good girl. Now, clothes off. Fold them. Neatly.”

His tone brooked no hesitation, no playful resistance. It was the voice he used when the Southern manners fell away, leaving only the granite certainty beneath. It was the voice that had told her, hours ago, I love YOU, with a weight that had anchored her spiraling sadness. She obeyed, her movements methodical, her fingers steady as she unbuttoned her blouse, stepped out of her slacks, folded each item into a tidy square on a nearby chair. The air was cool on her skin, raising gooseblesh. She stood naked before the apparatus, her back to him, waiting.

His footsteps were silent on the rug. His hands, when they settled on her bare shoulders, were warm and dry. He squeezed, once, a possessive, grounding pressure. “You carry everything up here,” he murmured, his thumbs tracing the tense line of her trapezius. “All the noise, all the weight. We’re going to turn the volume down.” His hands slid down her arms, guiding her forward. “On your knees. Knees on the pad, chest down on the leather. Arms out.”

The position was submissive, exposed. She settled into it, the padded leather cool against her breasts and belly. He fastened the cuffs around her wrists and ankles, not tight enough to hurt, but with a definitive, inescapable click of the buckles. The restraint was immediate, a relief so profound it felt like exhaling for the first time all day. He adjusted the bench, tilting it slightly, raising her hips, presenting her.

“Beautiful,” he said, a statement of fact. She heard the soft rasp of a zipper, the rustle of his clothes joining hers. Then his palm, broad and warm, came to rest on the small of her back. “This is my space. You are my guest in it. My only rule is that you feel everything I give you. No analyzing. No judging. Just sensation. Can you do that for me?”

“Yes,” she whispered into the leather.

“Yes, what?”

“Yes, Sir.”

The first touch wasn’t the flogger or the paddle. It was his mouth, hot and open, between her shoulder blades, tracing her spine down to the rise of her ass. It was a kiss of ownership, slow and lingering. Then his hands were on her, kneading the flesh of her rear, spreading her open, his thumbs brushing over her entrance, already slick, and the tight furl of her other hole. He hummed in approval. “Already singing for me.”

It was their private joke, from a night of laughter that had turned desperate and hot. A flicker of warmth amidst the vulnerability.

He picked up the suede flogger first. The falls whispered through the air, landing on her upper back and shoulders with a soft, thudding patter. It was a sensation more sound than sting, a rhythmic rain that loosened the muscles under her skin. He worked in a slow, steady pattern, each stroke deliberate, covering her back, her ass, the backs of her thighs. The warmth built, a gentle, radiating heat. She moaned, sinking deeper into the restraint, her forehead pressing into the padding.

“That’s it,” he coaxed. “Let it go. All of it. The sadness. The frustration. The noise. It doesn’t belong to you in this room.”

The rhythm changed. The softer flogger was set aside. The air parted with a sharper whistle before the braided leather landed crossways on her ass. This was a bite, a bright, clarifying stripe of pain that made her gasp and jerk against the cuffs. He gave her a moment to feel it bloom, to let the shockwaves radiate and soften into a deep, throaking heat, before delivering another, parallel to the first.

“Count them,” he said, his voice still calm, almost conversational.

“One,” she gasped.

Thwack.

“Two.”

He gave her ten. By the fifth, her skin was on fire, her breath coming in ragged pants. By the eighth, the pain had transformed, melting into a dense, pleasurable fog that clouded every thought that wasn’t him, his command, the next stroke. By the tenth, she was floating, a raw, open nerve of pure feeling, tears of release slick on her cheeks.

Silence fell, broken only by her harsh breathing. She heard him move to the cart, the clink of a bottle opening. Then cool liquid dribbled between the heated cheeks of her ass. Lube. His fingers, slick and insistent, pressed against her back entrance.

“This,” he stated, “is something you wondered about. Today, you don’t wonder. You know.”

He worked a single finger inside, the stretch intense, unfamiliar, a profound invasion. She cried out, a sharp, broken sound. He stilled, letting her adjust, his other hand stroking her lower back. “Breathe through it, Sam. It’s just a new kind of fullness. Take it for me.”

She forced a breath in, then out, willing her body to accept him. He began to move the finger, slowly, crooking it, and a jolt of unexpected, shocking pleasure-electrocuted her spine. She screamed, her body convulsing against the restraints.

“There it is,” he said, satisfaction rich in his voice. He added a second finger, the stretch becoming a burn that edged on too much, until he found that spot again and rubbed, relentless. Pleasure, thick and syrupy and wholly different from anything she’d known, began to pulse in time with his ministrations, coiling in her belly, making her clit throb untouched. He leaned over her, his mouth at her ear. “This is you, completely open to me. A place no one else touches. A place I own.” He scissored his fingers, and she sobbed, a river of slickness dripping from her cunt onto the leather beneath her.

He withdrew his fingers, and the emptiness was a shock. Before she could protest, he positioned himself at her front entrance, the broad head of his cock nudging her soaked, swollen folds. He didn’t ask. He drove into her in one deep, merciless thrust, filling the sudden void, stretching her in a wholly different, welcome way. She wailed, the dual sensations of recent violation and current penetration blurring into one overwhelming tsunami of fullness.

He set a brutal, piston-like rhythm, using the angle of the bench to plunge impossibly deep. One hand fisted in her hair, pulling her head back, arching her spine. The other reached around her hip, his fingers finding her clit, slick with her own arousal and the leftover lube. He circled it, hard and fast, in perfect counterpoint to his thrusts.

“Look at you,” he gritted out, his composure fraying into raw hunger. “My perfect fuck-toy. Taking everything I give you. My cock, my fingers, my pain. You’re mine.” The words were a brand, sealing the act.

The orgasm tore through her without warning, a cataclysm that started in her ass, ripped through her cunt, and detonated in her clit. It was endless, shameless, a screaming, sobbing convulsion that milked his cock as he roared his own release, pumping his heat deep inside her, his body rigid and shuddering against her bound form.

For long minutes, there was only the sound of their ragged breaths mingling in the quiet room. He slowly withdrew, his hands moving to the buckles at her wrists and ankles, releasing her with gentle care. Her limbs were jelly. He gathered her up, her sweat-slick, trembling body, and carried her to a large, upholstered chaise in the corner, laying her down on a soft blanket. He fetched a warm, damp cloth and tenderly cleaned the sweat from her brow, the tears from her cheeks, the mixed fluids from between her legs and the inflamed skin of her ass.

He stretched out beside her, pulling her back against his chest, his arms wrapping around her, his lips pressed to her damp hair. They lay in the silent dark, the city lights twinkling, irrelevant.

“Where did you go?” he asked quietly, his voice back to its normal, unhurried timbre.

She thought of the crashing wave, the point where thought dissolved into pure color and sound. “Away,” she murmured. “Somewhere quiet. Only you were there.”

He held her tighter. “Good.” A long pause. “The service center is closed for the night. The rep is officially off-duty.”

A weak, happy laugh bubbled out of her. She turned in his arms, finding his eyes in the dim light. The overwhelming sadness of the day was gone, not fixed, but momentarily powerless, held at bay by the profound, animal truth of her body and his. She saw her own peaceful exhaustion reflected in his gaze, along with a fierce, unchecked pride. He had taken her apart and was now holding all the pieces, safe in his hands. The sanctuary wasn’t the room, or the toys. It was the unshakeable certainty in his touch, the knowledge that in his world, her surrender was her strength, and her complete vulnerability was the highest form of his possession. In the aftermath of the storm they’d crafted, there was only the deep, steady calm of being utterly known.

================================================================================ INSIGHTS REPORT FOR 2026-03-12 Generated: 2026-03-14 14:03:35 Status: success Schema Version: 1.2.0 ================================================================================

METRICS

  • ⏱ Response Time --- Me→Them: 180s →4% vs 7d avg Them→Me: 88s ↑40% vs 7d avg

  • ✅ Conflicts & Repair --- Conflicts: 26 ↓ (avg 29.3 this week) Repair Rate: 100.0% →0% vs 7d avg Avg Recovery: 4.2 min ↑35% vs 7d avg

  • ⚖ Initiation --- Balance Ratio: 0.33 ↓64% vs 7d avg Cold Starts: 3 ↑ (avg 1.3 this week) 1 me / 2 them

  • ⚡ Velocity & Sessions --- High Velocity %: 97.7% →0% vs 7d avg Sessions: 23 ↓ (avg 34.4 this week) Avg Duration: 14.3 min ↑44% vs 7d avg

  • 💬 Message Volume --- Total Messages: 344 ↓ (avg 382.3 this week) From Me: 183 ↑ (avg 176.6 this week) From Them: 161 ↓ (avg 205.7 this week) With Signals: 332 ↓ (avg 372.3 this week)

SENDER COVERAGE

Sender Labeled / Total Rate Top Labels
Dave 180 / 183 98.4% emotional_support (36), humor (35), status_update (31), affection (21), checking_in (17)
Edited 4 seconds later: I know you have explained and I know you can handle it. And I more most times you love to help. But when I’m to the point where my attitude is annoying even myself, I’m sure it’s annoying to you, too. Lol 1 / 1 100.0% status_update (1)
Sam Willis 151 / 160 94.4% humor (36), vulnerability (25), status_update (21), frustration (19), affection (18)

DOMINANT LABEL

humor (typically status_update)

  • 🏷 Label Counts ---

    • humor: 65 (avg score: 71%)
    • emotional_support: 52 (avg score: 80%)
    • status_update: 45 (avg score: 63%)
    • affection: 39 (avg score: 84%)
    • vulnerability: 36 (avg score: 75%)
    • frustration: 30 (avg score: 69%)
    • checking_in: 25 (avg score: 68%)
    • appreciation: 13 (avg score: 82%)
    • excitement: 10 (avg score: 75%)

  • 🏷 Label Counts (cont.) ---

    • planning: 9 (avg score: 71%)
    • deep_sharing: 8 (avg score: 76%)
    • request: 8 (avg score: 65%)
    • flirting: 8 (avg score: 77%)
    • encouragement: 7 (avg score: 75%)
    • boundary_setting: 4 (avg score: 80%)
    • disagreement: 4 (avg score: 55%)
    • passive_aggression: 3 (avg score: 63%)
    • sexting: 3 (avg score: 88%)

ANOMALIES

Unusual Pattern

Initiation Count Them rose 1300.0% above your 7-day average

Unusual Pattern

Session Count dropped 33.2% below your 7-day average

Unusual Pattern

Emotional Support surged 112.9% vs 7-day average

Unusual Pattern

Total Cold Starts rose 133.3% above your 7-day average

Unusual Pattern

Frustration dropped 41.0% vs 7-day average

Unusual Pattern

Initiation Ratio dropped 64.1% below your 7-day average

Unusual Pattern

Avg Session Duration Minutes rose 43.7% above your 7-day average

PROVENANCE

Signals Prompt Version: signals.v2 Signals Model: unknown Rollup Computed At: N/A

================================================================================

(missing weekly)

Relationship Balance

Signal Flow Over Time

Conversation Topics